Eight Years On
by Hank's Lady
Summary: Heath does a lot of things he shouldn't when he's in his early 20s. Eight years on, things have changed and he finds the one person he's always thought about in the back of his mind. Heath Braxton/Dean Thompson MM Slash
1. Chapter 1

MM romance written from Heath Braxton's point of view. If you don't like Slash this isn't one for you.

CHAPTER ONE

I tossed and turned in my bed, alone and unable to sleep. Brax had finally flipped out over the number of different girls I'd had staying over, and on top of that, he'd discovered what I was really doing to make money. He'd suspected I was dealing weed, but he hadn't known about the coke until my supplier turned up at the house chasing payment. Brax had damn near knocked my head off my shoulders after he paid the guy off, and now I sported a nasty shiner as well as not having company. I'd heard Brax and Ricky screwing and trying not too successfully to be quiet, and it didn't help one bit. At twenty-three I was always as horny as fuck, but I wasn't ready for a girlfriend. Not by a long shot after Tegan got pregnant and barely let me see the kid. Her mother had gone crazy and refused to let me around the house, and I hadn't wanted to be a family man anyway. Not so young. But I still wanted to see Darce.

I rolled over again, grimacing. How the hell had things got to this? Even Casey had a girlfriend and was happy and he was only sixteen. Not that I wanted one, but I sure wanted something. And Brax's fist in my face wasn't one of them.

A slight sound outside caught my attention and I sat up, tilting my head towards the open window. The sound came again – a faint squeak as if the swing chair was moving in the wind. Except there was no wind. Or it could have been the door of the shed.

I slid out of bed and pulled on my surfing shorts, which was the nearest garment I could find in the dark. Rather than open my bedroom door and creep past Brax's room like a fucking criminal in my own house, I opened the window wider and climbed out into the back yard. My bare feet landed on grass and I made my way towards the shed, inwardly cursing that I hadn't thought to at least grab my phone, so I could use the torch function.

The shed door bumped closed and I moved faster. Someone was in there.

As I halted outside the small wooden structure, I heard a muffled sob coming from within. Then another, and a long drawn-out sniff. Then another sob. Shit. Who the hell was hiding in our shed and crying? Not a burglar, like I'd first suspected.

Cautiously, I opened the door and slipped inside. A cloud slid away from the moon at that moment and enough light shone through the window for me to see the huddled figure in the corner, amongst the unused plant pots, knees drawn up and arms wrapped around them. Wide frightened eyes looked up at me and I frowned down at him.

"Dean, what's going on?"

Dean Thompson was a mate of Casey's. They were the same age and had gone to school together until Dean dropped out. I didn't know him that well, only that he lived with his mum who was a bit of a psycho. He'd always been in trouble at school – nothing serious, just playing truant, failing to do homework, rotten grades etc. I also suspected he was gay. He gawked at me when he was around the house and I was walking about with my shirt off. I was only surprised Case and Brax hadn't noticed. He wasn't that discreet about it.

"I, um…" He sniffed and scrubbed his hands over his face. "Sorry. I'll go." He scrambled up and almost stumbled into me.

I grabbed his upper arms and steadied him, then held on as he broke again and wept helplessly. I tugged him against me and felt his tears on my bare chest. My arms slid around him of their own accord and I rested my chin on top of his head. Damn it. I felt sorry for the kid, but I didn't need to be feeding his potential fantasies about me. I tried to step back, but he'd fastened his arms around my waist and clung on, although his tears had stopped.

"Hey, come on." I withdrew my arms and rested my hands on his shoulders instead. "What happened?"

"My mum." He sniffed and finally pulled back to wipe his nose on his hand. Thank God he hadn't wiped it on my shoulder.

"What about her?"

"She, um, I don't know. She had a bad day."

"Another one?"

"She's been drinking. A lot. I don't think she knew what she was doing."

"Dean, what did she do?" A stab of anxiety made my guts clench.

"She went for me with a knife."

"Fuck. Did she hurt you?"

"No, I got away."

"When did this happen?"

"About an hour ago. I was, um, walking around. I didn't have anywhere else to go."

"Come in the house." I opened the shed door again.

"No! Brax will go mad. He doesn't like me."

"What gave you that idea? He doesn't have anything against you. You're just a kid. He won't turn you away when he hears what happened. Besides, he's too busy being mad at me to be bothered about you."

"Why, what did you do?" Dean wiped his face again and met my gaze. Then his eyes widened. "You have a black eye."

"Yeah, Brax wasn't too impressed with my latest, um, job."

"He hit you?"

"Don't worry about it. I probably deserved it. Come on." I grasped his wrist lightly and tugged him out of the shed.

"What did you do?" Dean repeated.

"It doesn't matter." I told myself he wasn't technically a minor, being old enough to leave home, work, and have sex, but admitting I'd been dealing coke wasn't something I was keen to tell the kid. Part of me kind of liked that he looked up to me and I wasn't so sure finding out I was a Class A dealer would impress him. Or maybe it would. Who knew? I led him to my window and climbed in, then turned to look out. "Take your shoes off. You're gonna land on my bed when you get in here."

Dean grinned suddenly. "That's your bedroom?"

I frowned. "Be quiet. Give me your shoes."

He stooped and a moment later passed me a pair of sneakers. Then he climbed through the window and dropped onto my bed, sitting cross-legged. I put his shoes on the floor and sat down at the other side of the bed.

"Do you need anything?" I asked. "Something to eat?"

"No, I'm okay. Thanks."

"You can stay here until the morning. Then we'll talk to Brax about this. Having something else to think about might stop him giving me another shiner." I grinned ruefully, and Dean smiled back.

"You really don't mind me staying here? With you?"

"No. It's fine. Get some sleep." I lay down, keeping my board shorts on, and waited for him to do the same. He was wearing a sleeveless T-shirt and cut-offs, which he kept on. He stretched out on top of the bed covers, leaving about a foot gap between us. I could hear him breathing, fast and uneven, and guessed he was nervous. "You're safe here," I said softly.

"I know. Thanks."

"I meant, I'm not gonna do anything," I clarified.

"I didn't think that. You're straight."

"Am I?" I chuckled quietly.

"Aren't you?" He rolled onto his side to look at me.

"Most of the time, I am," I admitted. "What Brax doesn't know about that won't hurt him. But like I said, I'm not gonna do anything."

"I wish you would," Dean blurted. Then he closed his eyes and ducked his head down. "Sorry. I didn't mean to say that."

"Are you gay?" I asked, already knowing what the answer would be.

"Yes. No one knows except Willow. My mum would kill me if she found out."

"Do you have a boyfriend?"

"No. Never done anything except a kiss one time. I never dared. I thought someone would find out and, um, tell my mum." He shivered and pulled his knees up towards his chest, his lips trembling. "You won't tell anyone, will you?"

"Of course I won't. It's okay. You can talk to me about anything you want."

"Do you, um, like me? At all?" he whispered.

"Don't, okay? You're too young."

"I'm legal."

"Just. If you want to fool around, you need to do it with someone your own age. I'm not gonna mess with you, Dean. It's not happening." I made it clear, while at the same time my cock twitched in my shorts and reminded me it with almost a year since I'd been with a guy. Here was a boy, hero-worshipping me, right in my bed, and I had to say no. Sixteen years old? Brax would probably rip my dick off and make me eat it.

"Sorry. You must think I'm a stupid kid. You're grown up, and hot, and could have anybody you want."

"I wouldn't go that far. You're not stupid, Dean. You're young, that's all. Don't try and rush into things before you're ready to."

"I am ready."

"All right. Go to sleep." I turned away, grimacing at the feel of my erection throbbing inside my shorts. The kid was good-looking, and he wanted me, and damn it, all I could think about now was touching him, grasping his hand and putting it on my cock.

Dean sighed and shuffled around, getting comfortable. I doubted I would sleep, but as I listened to his breathing, eventually slowing and steadying, I began to drift into unconsciousness.

When I woke, it was daylight, and Dean rested in my arms, his back to me and his hand holding my arm where it rested around his waist. My face was tucked into the back of his neck, breathing in the warm scent of him, and my dick was rigid against his arse. Fuck. I tried to get my arm free and move away, but he woke and wriggled against me, obviously feeling my erection. His face reddened, spreading to his ears and neck.

"Sorry. Morning wood." I made a joke out of it and moved back, but he held onto my arm.

"Please stay there. I don't want to wake up yet."

"You are awake."

"I haven't slept this well in weeks. Months."

I relented and kept my arm around him. My arousal ramped up another notch as he moved his hand off my arm and adjusted himself, indicating he was hard too. I slid closer again and let myself rest against him. I needed to come so badly it hurt. Then Dean put his hand over mine and pushed it down to his erection. His cut-offs were undone, and his underwear was damp over his rock-hard dick. He gripped my hand firmly, holding it there, cupping him. I groaned. I was going to Hell.

"Dean…" I protested. "I can't do this with you."

"Please. I'm not asking you to fuck me." His erection throbbed under my hand. "I feel safe with you."

"Fucking hell," I muttered. The kid was pushing all my buttons. I told myself how badly I was about to fuck up, but the demon in my head reminded me he was old enough although I could still get in the shit for it. At least he wasn't doing it with some random stranger who might hurt him or push him further than he wanted to go. "Can you be quiet?" I asked, not quite believing I'd actually said it.

"Yes." He let go of my hand and clenched his fist around a handful of pillow.

I hesitated, then slipped my hand inside his underwear and wrapped it around his dick. He groaned, then clamped his hand over his mouth. "Sorry."

"You have to be quiet," I reminded him. He nodded. Slowly, I began to move my hand up and down. He was leaking all over the place, literally dripping pre-come, and I guessed it would take about five seconds. I gripped tighter and rubbed my thumb over his tip. His cock felt good – bigger than I would have expected – slightly curved towards his belly. He arched his back and pushed himself into my hand. A moment later he spilled into my fist and over my bed covers, a whimper escaping his lips.

I laughed quietly. "I lasted about that long when I was your age." I took my hand off him and he turned to face me, quickly tucking himself back into his clothes.

"What was your first time like?"

"You mean with a boy?"

"Yes."

"Well, I was eighteen. He was a mate of Brax's, so a few years older than me. I'd had some fight with Brax and decided to spend the night on the beach. He found me there and we talked for a while and fooled around. Just, um, jerking off." I hissed through my teeth as Dean tugged the drawstring of my shorts loose and slid his hand down the front of them. "Christ, what are you doing?"

"Returning the favour. Don't tell me you would have given in to me if you hadn't been so desperate to get off."

"You know too much." I bit my lip as he grasped my erection and pumped it slowly.

"Let me. At least I get to try this without it being someone I don't know who might not want to stop at this."

I frowned, remembering having that exact same thought. "All right." I gave in and pushed my shorts down over my thighs to make it easier for him. He used his other hand to stroke my balls, which were already tight against my body. Hell's teeth. I was about to come, barely having lasted as long as he did. "Tighter." I covered his hand with mine, squeezing it around my dick. "You won't break it."

Dean chuckled and tightened his grip. I managed to last a couple of minutes before I shot my load onto the bed between us. Grinning, Dean took his hand away and licked it.

"Don't do that. Jesus." I sat up and pulled my shorts back into place.

"Why? I wanted to taste."

"You can't do that unless you know somebody's history. I'm clear, I get tested regularly and I don't fuck without a condom, but you need to be sure of that if you're gonna have someone's come in your mouth or up your arse."

"Sorry. But you're clear?"

"Yes, I said so."

The kid licked his hand again and carried on licking until it was clean. My partly softened dick twitched again, and I turned away. I had to stop looking at him. And I had to talk to Brax. I'd just heard him and Ricky talking as they made their way to the kitchen. Shit. This was going to go down well.

"Stay here, okay? I'm gonna speak to Brax." I found a shirt to put on and opened my bedroom door.


	2. Chapter 2

CHAPTER TWO

Brax had been more concerned for Dean's safety than the fact that I'd had him in my room.

I picked up a handful of sand and let it run through my fingers. That had been almost eight years ago. Brax had gone round to Dean's house to speak to his mum, but the place had been locked up. It had remained that way for some time. Mrs Thompson had left town and no one knew where she was. Dean stayed with us in Casey's room for six months and actually went back to school. Brax made him go back, and he'd do anything to keep on my brother's good side. Then an elderly great uncle crawled out of the woodwork and offered to give Dean a home until he finished school and could work and support himself.

Nothing else happened between him and me during the six months he stayed with us. It would have been too easy for me to take advantage worse than I already had, then Brax would have probably killed me. Casey wouldn't have been impressed either. Dean asked me a couple of times to repeat the experience, but I had a talk to him and set him straight. It definitely wasn't going to happen again. Brax and me were sort of guardians to him, and even though he was technically old enough to work, rent a room, and sleep with anyone he wanted, it would be all kinds of wrong for me to mess with him when we were supposed to be taking care of him. I suppose I'd had a modicum of maturity in me back then.

I grinned. Dean had been disappointed, but he'd got over it and started doing well in school. Willow was his best friend and she came over to hang out a fair bit. Then when Dean moved out we saw less of them both. A while later a whole load of shit went down. We moved to Summer Bay, Case died, Brax went to jail and escaped, I got Bianca pregnant right before she married Liam and they were divorced five seconds later. Then I married her. A few years had gone by in a whirlwind. Our baby boy died, then we found out I had another kid with a random one-nighter who was about to die and literally left me holding the baby. Bee wasn't impressed, but eventually she took to Harley like he was her own. We moved to the city with Darcy after Tegan also died. Hell, there was a whole trail of dead bodies in my wake.

And now, here I was, thirty-one, newly divorced, and back in the Bay. Bee and I loved each other, but we couldn't live together and fought like cat and dog. Darcy and Harley both had friends and good schools and wanted to stay in the city, and Bee was better for them than I was. The plan was for me to get a job and a home, and they'd visit in the holidays. I hadn't decided what I'd do yet, but I had the money for it. Bee and I had done well in the city. I'd managed a gym, got all my exams, and then Brax left us a heap of money when he, Ricky, and their kid Casey left for the States. I could set up or buy a business if I wanted.

I lifted my head and stared out to sea. It had been good catching up with Irene. She'd been amazing to me when nobody else would give me a go. Leah and Alf had no problem with me either, and I'd met a bunch of new people – Jasmine, a nurse; Robbo, an ex-cop; the Astoni family, and the Morgans who owed the restaurant that used to be Angelo's, and a garage. Willow Harris was living in the area and dating the eldest Morgan guy. I'd only seen her at a distance and the moment I saw her, I wondered about Dean.

I hadn't seen the kid since we left Mangrove River. He wouldn't be a kid now of course – he'd be a man. Where was he? Had he thought of me at all? He'd always lurked in the back of my mind after we left, even when I was married and actually enjoying city life. I just wanted to know he was okay, but we'd all lost touch and he could have been anywhere. I wondered if he was one of the River Boys now. He'd said that was his intention.

Dean had been stunned and crushed when we moved away. I hadn't seen him much for a while, although Casey had kept in touch with him. He came around the house the day when we were packing up, but Casey was out saying goodbye to a couple of other mates. Casey had sent Dean a text to ask him to come over, but apparently hadn't told him why.

I remembered him appearing at the open door and gazing at the stack of boxes on the path outside, and in the hall. Realisation dawned, and his face paled.

"You're leaving?" he'd said in a small voice. Brax and Ricky were out the back packing up the garden chairs and stuff.

"Yeah, didn't Case tell you?"

"He sent me a text asking me to come over, that's all." Dean's wide green eyes met mine. His were full of sadness and confusion.

"We're moving away. Making a new start."

"Where are you going?"

"Only a few miles away. Summer Bay."

"Okay."

I felt guilty as hell. He looked about ready to burst into tears. We'd been there for him when he had nobody else, and although things were going better for him now, he'd feel like we were abandoning him. "You have our numbers," I reminded him. "You can keep in touch."

"Sure." He nodded, not looking any less unhappy. He took a breath, then adopted a cocky expression instead. "I'm gonna join the River Boys. They'll need somebody to keep them in order with you guys gone."

I grinned. "Yeah, you're right. Just take care of yourself, Dean. Don't get into any shit the way I did."

"Heath! What the hell are you doing?" Brax bellowed from the back. "Get out here and help me with the swing chair!"

"I'd better let you get on," Dean said.

"Yeah. Lots to do." I offered him my hand to shake and he held on tight for a moment, eyes lowered. I tugged him closer and wrapped my free arm around him. "We won't be that far away if you need us," I reminded him.

"Yeah." He gave me a brief hug back and pulled away. "I'll keep in touch."

We'd never heard from him again and I'd always wondered what happened to him. Had he joined the River Boys like he said he would? Did he manage to keep his nose clean and make a life for himself?

I glanced down at my chest were the Blood and Sand tattoo covered one of my pecs. It reminded me of when Case had got his across the back of his shoulders. Brax hit the roof, but Case had been adamant he would be one of us. He hadn't lived long after that.

My eyes smarted. It was hard to believe my little brother was gone. I gazed out to sea, remembering how we'd gone out on surfboards and scattered his ashes. In some ways it seemed like yesterday.

A slight movement to my left caught the corner of my eye and I turned my head to squint at the figure walking along the beach, bare-chested and carrying a surfboard. He was tanned, brown-haired, muscular, probably not as tall as me. I shaded my eyes from the sun and stared harder. He was hot as hell, that was for sure. I hadn't been with a guy since before I married Bianca, and the thought of getting my hands on a hard dick made my own twitch in my shorts.

Holy fucking hell. Dean Thompson. The very object of my thoughts. His gaze landed on me at the exact moment I recognised him. He halted ten metres away, mouth dropping open.

"Hey." I got to my feet, my lips stretching into a grin of delight. I couldn't believe it.

"Heath!" He jammed the end of his board into the sand and strode towards me. When he reached me, he offered a hand for me to shake. I took it, then pulled my hand free and jerked him against me instead, wrapping my arms around him in a tight hug. He returned it immediately and pressed himself harder against me. It became much more than a hug of greeting between two mates who hadn't seen each other in a while. We clung to each other, bare chests pressed together, arms crushing each other. Eventually, we pulled apart. It took everything I had not to grab his hands, or kiss him, or something stupid that would draw attention to us. I hadn't expected to feel so much all of a sudden. It must have been because I'd been thinking about him. I sat down quickly and gestured at the sand. He sat beside me.

"What are you doing here?" he asked. His voice had deepened, and his light green eyes shone as they met mine.

"I could say the same to you. When did you move to the Bay?"

"About a year ago."

"I just came back. I was here for a couple of years after we left Mangrove River. Then I got married and moved to the city."

"You're married?" His face fell.

"Not any more. We just got divorced."

"Oh. I'm sorry." He didn't look the least bit sorry, and my pulse quickened as I realised he was just as pleased to see me as I was him.

"How've you been?" I asked.

"Oh, you know. Okay."

"Really? What happened after we left?"

"Nothing you want to hear about. I grew up. Moved here after me and some of the boys came to help Ash out. Martin Ashworth?"

I nodded. "Yeah, he was good mates with Brax. They met in prison." I smiled crookedly.

"I know."

"What are you doing now?"

"I have an apprenticeship as a mechanic, at the garage here. Late starter, I know." He made a face. "I wasted a lot of time being, um, kind of like you were when you were my age."

"Dealing?" I gasped, then realised I'd never told him what I did.

"You were dealing drugs?" His eyes widened almost comically.

I laughed. "Yeah. Remember that night I found you in the shed and I had a black eye? Brax had found out what I was doing and punched me. I quit doing it then, before he killed me."

"Shit. I was oblivious."

"You were sixteen," I pointed out.

"Don't remind me." He grimaced and sighed. I just knew he was thinking about that night.

"Have you been okay, though?" I asked again. "What about your mum?"

"Crazy as ever." Another sigh. "She tried to kill me about eighteen months ago. I left as soon as I could. She doesn't know where I am now."

"I'm sorry. Where are you living?"

"The caravan park."

"Me too, until I find a flat or a house to rent."

"You're staying?" His smile returned, and his eyes lit again.

"Yeah, I'm staying."

"I missed you," he blurted. "I know you didn't really want me back then. But I kept thinking about that night."

"I did too," I admitted. "I shouldn't have done what I did, but I couldn't seem to stop myself."

"It helped me," Dean said. "I wanted to experiment, but like you said, I was safer with you than some stranger. About a year after that I met a guy my own age. We dated and, well, you know. We took our time."

"I'm glad. Are you still together?"

"Hell, no. It only lasted about eight months, until he decided he wasn't gay after all. I haven't really had a relationship since then. Just a few casual things."

I nodded and told myself I shouldn't be feeling such intense relief that he was single. What was I going to do? Hook up with him again? Would he want that? From the look on his face, he'd do anything I wanted if I said the word. And then what? Walk away again? Stumble into a relationship I wasn't sure I wanted? It wasn't that I didn't want him because I did, and I'd take him to bed in a heartbeat. He'd been cute as hell as a kid, but now… if I wasn't old enough to know better, I'd drool, and rush back to my van to jerk off over him. He was hot, and having a hot man want me felt much too good to turn away from it. But I didn't want to hurt him, and I knew I had before. I'd given him exactly what he wanted, then snatched it away.

My thoughts jumbled together, and I didn't realise he was talking until he touched my arm. "Heath?"

"Sorry. Miles away."

"Should I go? I was going for a surf."

"No, it's okay. I was just thinking about… nothing really. Stuff." I smiled and shook myself. "I need to get a new board. Got rid of my old one before we left the Bay. Are you good? Surfing?"

"I think so." He turned slightly away to look down the beach and I immediately spotted the Blood and Sand tattoo across the back of his shoulders, the same place Casey and Brax had theirs.

"You were a River Boy, then?"

"Yeah." He turned back to look at me. "The leader, for a while. But the connection wasn't so good over the last few years. A lot of guys moved away. The new ones had other stuff going on. I decided it was time for me to leave too."

We sat there talking and time passed. Dean never got his surf. He suddenly caught sight of his watch, realised the time, and made the excuse that he was going to be late for work. It was a Saturday afternoon and I doubted that was the real reason, but I didn't get the chance to ask before he'd grabbed his board and charged away, calling over his shoulder that he'd catch up with me soon.

I stayed where I was for another hour, thinking about him and wondering what I should do. I wanted him, I couldn't pretend I didn't. I kept thinking about that morning he'd jerked me off and licked his hand, and my dick throbbed between my thighs. He'd be about twenty-four now, not a kid anymore. I wouldn't have any reason to feel guilty if I fucked him. Except for the knowledge that he'd want a lot more than a quick romp, and I wasn't sure I could give him that. Bianca had done a number on me screwing up my head. I didn't know if I could do another relationship.

Eventually, I made my way to the surf club to buy a board and have a chat with Alf. When I left, I caught sight of John Palmer gesticulating at a bunch of people in orange vests, armed with plastic bags and in the process of picking up litter. Community service. Poor bastards. I watched for a moment, and my eyebrows rose as I realised Dean and Willow were two of the unfortunate people working off their punishment for whatever they'd done. Dean turned at that moment and saw me. His face flushed scarlet and he spun away, then hurried to another spot to pick up some discarded beer cans. I walked away, not wanting to cause him any more embarrassment. I'd talk to him about it next time I saw him. Whatever he'd done couldn't be that bad if he only got community service.


	3. Chapter 3

CHAPTER THREE

I didn't see Dean for the rest of the day. I got some food at Salt and hung out near the fire pit at the caravan park, but I didn't see him come or go from his van. Eventually, it got dark and I went to my own van. I needed to do something about finding a permanent place to rent and look into what options were available for work. Monday, I told myself. I intended to spend Sunday surfing, and hopefully catch up with Dean again.

I headed down to the beach early and caught a few waves. My skills hadn't gone rusty during the years away, and I kept going for a couple of hours. Eventually, as I rode another wave back to the beach, I spotted Dean in the distance, his board stuck in the sand as he stood watching me. I jumped off the board into the shallows, picked it up, and strode towards him.

"Hey," he said quietly.

"I was looking for you last night," I told him.

"I was in my van."

"Okay. So, do you want to tell me what the community service is for?"

He avoided my eyes. "Not really."

"I've done far worse, I'm sure," I coaxed.

"I don't want you to think less of me."

"I wouldn't." I stuck my board in the sand beside his. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"Yes. You'll find out anyway. People around here are all gossips."

"I saw Willow was doing the same thing. Did you get involved in something together?"

Dean nodded and sat down on the sand. I sat too. He picked up a shell and fiddled with it. "I was facing a jail sentence. I had a good lawyer, and my work at the garage helped."

"Jail? Fuck! What did you do?" I gasped.

"Um, B and E. And, um, credit card skimming. And… hell, that's enough."

"There's more?" I gazed at him, horrified. How had things gone so wrong for him?

"Assault. It wasn't on purpose. I knocked him over trying to run away."

"Who?"

"Alf."

"Christ," I muttered. "How did you get into this, Dean?"

"Now you think I'm a fucking loser," he muttered.

"No, I don't. I want to know how things went so wrong."

"Willow has a gambling problem," he began. "She got into a lot of debt and I borrowed the money to pay it off for her."

"From who?"

"Loan shark."

"Fuck. And he put the screws on you?"

"Yeah. Doubled the debt, then trashed my van and made threats when I didn't pay up on time. So, we got a skimmer and set it up at Salt. We didn't think anyone was there, but Alf was in the office downstairs. I knocked him over trying to run out. Willow called the ambos, which is how we got caught. Her voice was on the tape."

"Oh, Dean," I groaned.

"I was facing ten years."

"That's steep for a first offence, even for what you did."

"It, um, wasn't a first offence. I did time a couple of years ago." He hung his head. "Don't ask me about that, okay?"

"It's all right. You don't have to tell me. You seem to have turned things around now. Is the apprenticeship going well?"

"Yeah, it is. I like the work. Justin hated me to start with, but he's been pretty decent. Willow told him some stuff about my mum, softened him up a bit."

"That's good."

Dean grinned suddenly. "There's this kid, Ryder, follows me around like a puppy the way I used to with you. He's seventeen, wants to be a River Boy. He's not gay, it's not like that. Just the hero-worship thing. He doesn't seem to have any friends his own age except for a couple of girls."

I smiled back. "What are you doing today? Other than going for a surf."

He shrugged. "Nothing much."

"You wanna catch a couple of waves, then get some breakfast? I need to figure out what I'm going to do for work. Maybe you can tell me what options there are around here."

"Sure!" Dean's grin widened, and he got to his feet. I rose and grabbed my board.

An hour later, we hit the showers at the caravan park, changed into jeans and T-shirts, and headed for the diner.

"Hello, darl!" Irene greeted, beaming. Then her smile slipped. "Dean."

"Get a table," I told him, and went to the counter to order some food.

"What are you doing hanging around with that young criminal?" Irene said under her breath.

"I've known him since he was a kid. I used to be pretty messed up when I was his age. You probably remember. It sounds like he's trying to make a go of it."

"Well, yes," Irene said grudgingly. "He's keeping his head down."

"He just needs people to give him a go. Can I get two full breakfasts, please? And coffee?"

"Of course, love. Go and sit down. I'll bring them over."

I went to the table and joined Dean. His face was solemn. Our knees bumped under the small table and I grinned at him. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah. I just get sick of hearing people bad-mouthing me. I know it's my own fault. It just doesn't seem like it's ever going away."

"I've been there," I reminded him. "It takes time. Irene's a good woman. If you knocked Alf down, she'll be smarting over that, but she'll get over it. He's renting you a van, isn't he? So, he's obviously not holding a grudge."

"I apologised," Dean said quietly. "He seemed to appreciate that."

Marilyn came over then, with a tray holding two mugs of coffee, one with milk in, the other with a little milk jug and sugar bowl beside it. "Here you are, boys. I didn't know how you liked yours, Heath, so I brought milk and sugar separately."

"Thanks, Marilyn." I appreciated more that she'd made Dean's the way he clearly liked it. I took the mug of black coffee, added some milk, and declined the sugar.

Dean took his and sipped it. "Thanks, Marilyn."

"You're welcome." She took the tray away.

"She seems okay with you."

"Yeah, she gives most people a second chance."

"So, what options do I have around here? I mean, for work. There's the restaurant, the garage, the gym, what else?"

"Not a lot. You could teach at the school?" Dean grinned.

"Hell, no. Bianca's a head teacher. How she does it every day, with hordes of teenagers behaving like I used to, I have no clue. I'm a qualified gym instructor. Worked in the one here for a while before we left for the city. Then I got qualified and managed one there."

"Well…" Dean quirked an eyebrow. "I heard Palmer saying the gym here's for sale. Robbo's after it, but he hasn't made an offer yet, as far as I know."

"Robbo's the ex-Fed?"

"Yeah. He's a decent guy. He shares an apartment with Colby, the local cop who used to be a River Boy too."

"River Boy turned cop? Really?" I scratched my head over that one.

"Yeah, it's a long story. Anyway, me and Colby were good mates at one time. Still are, I guess. So, I crashed on their couch for a while until I got in the shit and Colby couldn't be seen to be so friendly with me. Robbo's a good guy, but all's fair in, um, business. If you're interested in the gym…" He paused. "I suppose it depends if you can come up with the money though."

"Money's not an issue," I said. "And yeah, I'm interested. Who do I talk to about it?"

"Palmer can tell you who the owner is. He manages it."

"Okay, good. Thanks."

"Breakfast's ready." Irene interrupted us and placed two loaded plates in front of us.

"I missed your breakfasts," I told her. "Bee was a rotten cook."

"I know, love. Set fire to my stove once." Irene patted me on the shoulder and left us to it.

We ate our breakfast and Marilyn brought us refills of coffee when she took away the empty plates.

"Where can I find John today?" I asked her.

"Oh, well, he'll be at the beach right now, but he'll be in for his breakfast soon," she told me. "Do you need him for something?"

"Just a chat about something." The diner was filling up and I didn't want my business gossiped about before I'd even asked if it was feasible.

"Oh, well, he should be in by the time you've finished your coffee."

John Palmer came into the diner fifteen minutes later. He went to the counter to talk to Marilyn, who made him some coffee and suggested he get a table while she prepared his breakfast.

"I'll get out of your way," Dean told me.

"You can stay."

"Palmer's not my biggest fan. I don't want to scupper your chances."

"You won't. He's the manager, not the owner." I got up and went to Palmer's table. "Morning, John. You got a minute?"

He raised his eyebrows. "I suppose so."

I took a seat. "You manage the gym, right?"

"I do." His eyes narrowed. "Are you after a job?"

"No. I'm interested in buying the place." I said it quietly, but even in the busy diner, I noticed a couple of nearby people glanced at me.

"The gym's a good business. It's not cheap," Palmer said sceptically.

"I don't suppose it is. I have money. I want you to put me in touch with the owner."

"One of our locals is interested in it. Robbo."

"Has he made an offer?"

"Not yet."

"Does he have experience?"

"Not that I know of."

"Well, I do. I managed a gym in the city, have all the relevant certificates to be a trainer, and I have more than enough money for whatever the price is."

Palmer nodded. "All right. The owner is keen to sell quickly."

A couple of minutes later, I returned to Dean where he waited at the table, toying with his empty mug and trying not to look as if he'd been listening.

"Let's get out of here," I said. I went to the counter to pay Marilyn for the breakfasts, then followed Dean out of the diner. "So, he gave me the owner's number. He said Robbo's interested but hasn't made an offer yet. I have the advantage in that I have the experience he doesn't have."

"When are you gonna call?"

"Now. Palmer said the guy's in a hurry to sell." We headed down to the beach and as soon as we were out of earshot of anyone else, I called the number Palmer had given me.

"Yes?" The answer was immediate, and I wondered if Palmer had got in touch to let him know he'd be hearing from me.

"My name's Heath Braxton. I'm interested in buying the gym," I said without preamble.

"Ah, yes. John Palmer told me you'd be contacting me." He spoke for a few minutes and told me what the asking price for the gym was.

"I understand you haven't had any offers yet."

"I'm expecting one. I'm not willing to reduce the price at this stage."

"I'm not asking you to. I'm putting in an offer here and now for the figure you just told me. If you accept it, I can have the funds in your bank tomorrow."

"Oh! You don't require a mortgage? Or…?"

"No. Money's just sitting there with your name on it." I smirked at Dean and stuck my thumb up. He grinned back. Within ten minutes, I had a promise of an emailed contract later that day for me to look over, and the bank details for me to transfer the funds. I ended the call, beaming. "I just bought a gym!"

"Fuck me!" Dean exclaimed, then flushed.

Tempted as I was to make a comment about how I wanted to do just that, I held my tongue and gave him a brief one-armed hug instead. I could think about that later. I had another call to make. "I'm gonna call Brax," I said.

"He'll no doubt be pleased for you," Dean said.

"He'll tell me I'm an arsehole. I don't have all the money just sitting there. I'm fifteen grand short."

"Oh." Dean's smile slipped. "What are you going to do?"

"Tap him for the rest. He's good for it and he's too far away to give me hell over it." I chuckled and selected Brax's number from my contacts. He answered after a couple of rings.

"Heath, how's it going?"

"I bought the gym," I said.

"You had enough money?"

"Um, yeah. Not quite."

"Fuck. How much?"

"Fifteen grand."

"Christ's sake, Heath," Brax muttered.

"I'll pay you back."

He snorted. "Right. Like I haven't heard that before. When do you need it by?"

"Tomorrow."

He swore again. "I'll make a transfer now. Remember how much you owe me, little brother."

"Fuck off with the little," I teased. "Thanks."

"Make it worth my while."

"I intend to. The gym's going to be a talking point around here pretty soon."

Brax laughed and hung up.

"He's transferring the money now," I told Dean.

"Damn. I wish I had a brother. A rich one."

"Yeah, remember how he used to punish me for stuff when I was younger? I always had bruises on my face. Suppose it was my own fault, the amount of times I fucked things up. Well, the gym's cleaned me out now, so I'm gonna have to stay in the van a while longer. I'll look for an apartment or something in a couple of months."

"When are you gonna tell him the good news?" Dean jerked his head to the left and I spotted Robbo jogging along the sand, all red and sweaty.

"He'll find out soon enough. In the meantime, I think we should celebrate later. Dinner at Salt?"

"All right. But I'm paying. You did just clean yourself out after all."

"I think I can afford to feed myself, but thanks. I'll go for that." I stayed with him a while longer, until Willow came looking for him. Then I left them and went back to my van. I collected my truck and drove into Yabbie Creek to look around and stock up on a few essentials, then returned to the van and checked my emails on my phone.

The contract sat in my inbox waiting for me to read and sign it. I read it twice, relieved it could be e-signed, otherwise I would have had to find someone with a printer and scanner who was willing to let me use them. After I'd signed and returned it, I checked my bank account and discovered the funds from Brax already there. He still had an Australian bank account and had made an instant transfer. I pinged him a quick text to say thanks, then set up a transfer to the gym owner.

By the time I'd done all that, the time had got away from me. It was already seven o'clock, the time I'd arranged to meet Dean before going to Salt. I hurried to the shower block to freshen up and put on my one pair of smart trousers and a blue shirt. My pulse quickened as I headed towards his van, and I wondered why it suddenly felt like a date.


	4. Chapter 4

CHAPTER FOUR

Dean was watching from the window and came out before I reached the van. He wore black jeans and a green shirt that brought out the colour in his eyes.

"I'm sorry I'm late," I said.

"It's okay. I thought you must have been busy."

"I was. The time got away from me. I would've sent you a text, but I don't have your number. The gym owner sent me the contract. Took me a while to read through it all on my phone. It's all signed and sealed now."

"Congratulations."

"Thanks."

We began to walk to Salt, not talking as we made the short journey to the restaurant. A young guy was playing pool by himself and his face lit up the minute he saw Dean. I guessed this was Ryder.

"Dean! Hey!" He exclaimed. "You want to have a game?"

"Not now; another time." Dean glanced at me. "Ryder, this is Heath Braxton."

"Oh! Hey. Nice to meet you." Ryder politely offered his hand for me to shake and I shook quickly. "You're new around here?"

"Yeah." I glanced at the doors leading to the gym, feeling a swell of pride. "I just bought the gym."

"Wow! That's cool. You look like you, um, work out." Ryder glanced at my shirt, tight around my biceps and across my chest, then flushed scarlet. "Sorry. I didn't mean… I'm not, um… sorry."

I chuckled. "Don't worry about it, kid. See you around."

I steered Dean towards the stairs, casually resting my hand on his back for a second. He grinned sideways at me and headed up the stairs. Ryder gawked, eyes wide. I followed a few steps behind, my eyes on a level with Dean's arse, admiring the tight glutes inside his trousers. Damn. I could no longer think of a reason why I was keeping my distance. I had to get my hands on him and soon.

Dean and I took a corner table at the far end of the room from the bar. Brody Morgan was behind the bar and a server came over to us with some menus. I asked for two beers and passed Dean one of the menus. When the server returned with the drinks, we'd both decided on steak. Dean requested his well done, the same way I ate mine.

"Brax eats his rare," I commented. "He says my name should be changed to Heathen for cremating perfectly good meat."

Dean laughed, and his eyes sparkled. God, I wanted to touch him. Even if it was just his hand. Anything. My cock lengthened, and I shuffled in my seat, reluctant to put my hand under the table and make it obvious I was adjusting myself. Dean's gaze heated, and I wondered if the expression on my face was giving me away.

What the hell. I slid my hand under the table, but instead of adjusting my half erection, I rested my palm on his thigh. His eyes widened, and his lips parted. I stared at his mouth and licked my lower lip. He sucked in a breath, his thigh quivering under my hand. I squeezed firmly and edged my hand higher.

"Don't," he whispered.

I snatched my hand back and placed it on the table top, confused. "I'm sorry."

He leaned closer to speak directly into my ear. "Don't tease when we've still gotta eat dinner. I'm so fucking hard."

I grinned and moved my head just enough to brush my jaw against his, grazing his skin with my scruff. His breath huffed out and the hand not holding his beer bottle clenched into a fist. I wished we'd ordered pizza to go. His words had made my half hard cock stiffen fully so it strained against my fly. I turned my head a little the other way and pressed my mouth to his ear. "I'm gonna make you come so hard later."

A soft whimper escaped Dean's lips, and he pulled away, his eyes hot, pupils dilated. I was well aware we were drawing attention to ourselves, but I couldn't help it. I edged my hand closer to his and stroked the inside of his wrist with one finger, feeling the rapid pulse.

"Heath," he breathed.

"I know."

"I didn't think you'd want…" He gulped and dropped his gaze.

"I didn't want to rush in before I thought about things," I whispered. I gave his wrist a gentle squeeze and moved my hand away. Christ, it was going to be tough getting through the meal when all I could think about was taking his clothes off and doing everything I'd ached to do all those years ago and knew I couldn't.

We ate slowly, enjoying the steak, chips, and salad and a couple more beers. When we finished eating, Dean went to the bar to pay for the meal as he'd promised. I got up and casually stuck my hands in my pockets to disguise my erection as I headed for the door. Dean caught me up on the stairs and we walked down and left the building.

Outside it was dark, the moon hiding in the clouds and shedding no light on the way back to the caravan park. I glanced around us and found no one in sight. I caught Dean's arm and pulled him to a halt before we reached the vans. We were only a couple of hundred metres from them, but I couldn't even wait that long.

I lifted my other hand to his face, gripped his chin, and brought my mouth down on his in a hard kiss. His lips parted, and he kissed back, hot and hard, his tongue emerging to meet mine. I groaned and pulled back to draw a breath, then went back in harder, crushing his lips. He whined and slid an arm around my neck, bringing his body against mine. He was as hard as I was, and our groins rubbed together, giving each other a little but not quite enough friction. I moaned in frustration and broke the kiss again. "Your place or mine?"

"I don't care."

"Mine's nearer." I pulled out my key and we began to walk the incredibly long two hundred metres to my van on the nearest edge of the park. When we reached the van, I shoved my key at the lock upside down and swore, hand trembling as I turned it the other way up. Dean huffed out a laugh as the key finally slid home and turned. I stumbled up the steps and stepped aside to let him in. He shoved the door closed behind him, gripped my neck with both hands, and reconnected our lips.

I'd never kissed him, not even that night when he'd been so desperate for something to happen. I'd wanted to and told myself it would be wrong, even though I'd gone ahead and touched him anyway. Now I couldn't get enough. I fucked his mouth with my tongue, backing him towards the bed as I fumbled with his shirt buttons and wondered what the hell had possessed him to wear a button-down when a T-shirt was so much easier to get off. The back of his legs bumped against the bed and he took one hand off my neck to brace it against the wall as his balance wavered. I wrapped an arm around his waist to support him and wedged a thigh between his legs. He tore his lips from mine and sucked in a breath, then finished unfastening the shirt and shrugged it off. When he began to attack my shirt buttons, I slid a hand between us and released my belt buckle, then my fly. I moved my legs again and my trousers slid down to my ankles, the head of my cock forcing its way out of the top of my briefs.

Half laughing, I toed off my shoes and struggled to kick the trousers off my legs, while Dean pushed my shirt off my shoulders and tugged at one of the cuffs to get it off my hand. I gave up on his fly and freed myself from the shirt cuffs, my trousers, and my underwear, while he wriggled out of his jeans and boxers. Socks followed, disappearing into the dark as we tumbled onto the bed in a tangle of limbs.

"God, Dean," I groaned. Finally, there was nothing to stop us – not his age, or my guilt, or anything else. I pulled him into another kiss and pushed his thighs apart with my knees. He slid both arms around me, holding on tight as our dicks rubbed together, my hips jerking awkwardly as I bucked against him. Complete lack of finesse brought on by desperation.

I forced myself to regain control of myself and think about what I wanted from this. A quick, frantic jerk-off session? No, I wanted to give him something to remember. I broke the kiss and lifted myself off him, lowering my head to nibble the side of his neck and his collar bone. He squirmed and shivered, arching his neck. I traced a line over his left pec to his nipple and sank my teeth in, soothing the bite with my tongue when he hissed and writhed, nails digging into the back of my neck. He breathed fast and unevenly, body trembling, his dick leaking pre-come onto his belly. I worked my way lower, licking into his navel and teasing a few soft brown hairs, sticky with his fluid.

"Heath… fuck…" he moaned. "Jesus, I'm not gonna last."

I chuckled. "We've got plenty of time." I extended my tongue and licked over the head of his cock, humming at the taste. I sucked him into my mouth and swallowed around the head, then drew him in deeper. He swore and wriggled, stretching his arms out to find something, anything to grab onto. One hand knocked a bunch of things off the cabinet beside the bed, and he clutched at the wardrobe door handle with the other. He was right – he wasn't going to last. His balls were tight against his body, his dick thickening as his orgasm approached. I released him for a second, wet my fingers with saliva and pre-come, then drew him back into my mouth. As I sucked him and squeezed his balls with the other hand, I stroked slick fingers back towards his hole and circled it, teasing and lightly pressing until the tip of one finger pressed in.

"Yeah," he gasped. "More."

I slid my finger deeper, my cock jerking under me at the feel of his tight heat gripping me. Fucking him was going to feel incredible, even with a desensitising condom on. I'd never actually fucked a man. Wanted to, but despite my history of one-nighters, I hadn't wanted to fuck a guy I didn't know. The few I'd been with had been happy with sucking and finger-fucking.

I pulled my finger out and went back in with two, curling them upwards to search for his prostate. I knew it was there – I'd found my own a few times, somewhat clumsily. Dean's hips jerked and he clenched around my fingers as his dick pushed deeper into my throat. He came hard, smothering a yell of pleasure with his fist. I swallowed and sucked harder, drawing the last of it out of him until he whined in protest, over-sensitive. Grinning, I released him and licked my lips. "Yeah, that was faster even than last time," I teased.

"Fuck off," he panted. "And do you remember what you said to me when you came in my hand and I licked it?"

"Fuck," I muttered.

"It's okay. I would have told you if there were any issues. I've never fucked without a condom and I got tested after the last time. All clear."

"Good. Me too. I'm sorry about that." I shook my head, irritated with myself. My dick throbbed between my thighs and reminded me it hadn't had any attention so far. I reached over to the cabinet and opened the top drawer to find lube and a condom, thanking God I had both. I'd stocked up before I even left the city, knowing I'd need them. I liked lube for jerking off and the occasional exploration of my own arse.

I ripped open a condom packet and rolled it on, resisting the urge to stroke myself. I'd come too fast as it was. I squeezed out plenty of lube and coated myself. He was tight, but I guessed he's stretch around me. My fingers fitted easily enough. I shuffled closer, still on my knees, and tucked my hands under his arse to lift him so I could line myself up. Dean looked up at me in the dim light coming from a distance park light. Suddenly he was perfectly still, hands resting on the mattress either side of him, his dick was still hard, twitching against his abs.

I gripped the base of my erection and guided myself, but as I pushed the head in, Dean stiffened and flinched, eyes widening.

"Relax," I said softly. "Been a while, has it?"

"I…" He licked his lips.

Alarm filled me. We hadn't even had this discussion. This was my first time at the grand old age of thirty-one, so why would I assume he'd already had anal sex? "You have done this before?"

"Heath, I…"

"Shit." Carefully, I pulled out. I should have checked; been more careful; taken more time. "Why didn't you tell me? I could have hurt you."

"I don't know." He shifted his gaze away from mine, and his cock softened. "I thought it'd be okay. I have done it, but I topped."

"Fuck," I said under my breath. I lay down beside him, head propped up on my hand, and rested my hand on his chest. His heart was racing, and his body trembled slightly. "You should have told me. I haven't done it either."

"Seriously?" He turned his head to face me again.

"Yeah. Plenty of fooling around, but I didn't want to fuck some random stranger, contrary to popular belief." I smiled. "Are you sure you want this? You said you topped before. Do you want to do it that way?"

Dean's eyes widened almost comically. "You'd let me fuck you?"

"If it's what you want."

He paused, then shook his head. "I want you in me. I always did. I think that's why I never let anyone else do it."

"Then we'll take our time." I leaned closer and brushed my lips against his. "If you want to stop, tell me."

He grinned. "You always took care of me. Even when I was a stupid kid."

"You were never stupid." I pulled away quickly. Suddenly things were getting way too intense. I didn't know what I'd expected this to turn into, but I hadn't expected the strong tug on my heart strings as I looked into his eyes. From the expression on his face, he knew exactly what I was feeling.


	5. Chapter 5

CHAPTER FIVE

I crawled down to the foot of the bed and pushed Dean's legs wider apart. This was something else I hadn't done before, and I wasn't sure how good I'd be at it, or if I'd even like doing it, but I wanted to make it good for him. I started at the head of his dick and licked a stripe down his shaft to his balls. Drawing one into my mouth, I sucked on it gently, savouring the musky taste and the brush of soft hair on my nose.

Dean arched his back and clenched his fists at his sides. "I thought you wanted to fuck."

I released him. "Be patient." Tucking my hands under the backs of his thighs, I pushed his legs up and worked my tongue lower, over the sensitive ridge behind his sac to his anus.

"Oh, fuck!" he yelped.

I chuckled and blew warm air across his damp skin. He shuddered and squirmed. "Heath…"

Circling his hole with my tongue, I wetted the puckered skin before blowing another breath across it. He whimpered and clutched at the bed covers. "Please…"

"Relax." I licked over his hole, back and forth, then paused in the centre and jabbed with the tip of my tongue.

He clenched, thighs trembling. "What are you doing?"

"What's it feel like? Breathe out."

He let out a shaky breath and I pushed in with my tongue.

"Oh, fucking Christ!"

I imagined most of the caravan park occupants heard him, and I laughed again as I repeatedly licked into him. I'd never expected to be doing anything like this with a guy, and I hadn't expected to enjoy it so much either. My dick hardened even more in the condom, and I wondered if it was possible for me to come just from rimming him. Reluctantly, I withdrew my tongue and replaced it with two fingers. He groaned and pushed against my hand.

"Okay?" I sat up and wiped the back of my hand across my mouth.

"Yeah." He reached down to his erection and stroked it slowly. "I'm almost ready to go off again."

"Keep your hands off it, then." I met his eyes. "I want you to come when I'm in you."

He kept his gaze fixed on mine and took his hand off himself. His expression was a mixture of lust and adoration, and I broke the eye contact. Everything was already too intense. I grabbed the lube again and coated my fingers. He was wet from my tongue, but I supposed you could never have too much lube. I went in with two fingers, then added a third. He shuddered and bit his lip.

I paused. "Hurt?"

"No."

I stretched him slowly, my balls aching with frustration from waiting so long. I wasn't used to delaying. When I wanted to come, I jerked off or fucked, and I went at it like a battering ram. I couldn't do that with him, and I clenched my fist on my thigh to stop myself grabbing my dick in my free hand. When I eventually withdrew my fingers and shuffled forward on my knees, my erection jerked erratically in anticipation. I guided it into him and stopped when the head breached his muscle. Fuck, he was so tight. I breathed hard, my heart racing.

"Do it. I'm okay," Dean murmured.

I pressed in, slow and steady, until I was as deep as I could get, my balls pressed up against his arse. He groaned and hissed through his teeth. "Damn, you're bigger than I thought." He laughed and groaned again.

"Do you want me to stop?"

"No. Go slow."

I pulled back, then pushed forward again. It was obvious he was in some discomfort, but gradually he relaxed more and began to move with me. The tension went out of his face and he grasped his dick. As I began to thrust into him in a steady rhythm, he pumped his erection at the same time.

Neither of us spoke. The van was filled with the wet sound of my dick pumping into his arse, both of us panting and grunting, the bed squeaking under us. I slid my knees wider apart and leaned down over him. His hand and the tip of his cock bumped against my stomach as he jerked off, leaving a wet smear on my skin. I tried to take deep breaths and slow things down, but my orgasm was already creeping up on me, my balls tight and ready to blow. I pushed Dean's hand off himself and wrapped mine around him instead. I jerked him hard and fast, pushing him towards the finish in an effort to get us there together. He reached down to grip my hips, encouraging me to fuck him harder, but I held back a little, aware that he was probably going to be sore later. I almost laughed at myself – me being considerate during sex. Bee had often complained at me being too rough.

I shoved my ex-wife out of my mind and fixed my gaze on Dean's face. His eyes were closed, teeth biting into his lower lip, droplets of sweat peppering his forehead. As if he sensed my stare, he opened his eyes and met mine, the pupils dilated and filled with something like awe. I tried to look away and couldn't, and then I came, pulsing inside the condom. Dean tightened more around me, his dick jerking in my hand and spattering his chest with his fluid. When we were done, and I released him, I gripped the edge of the condom and eased out. He flinched and hissed. I glanced down, hoping I hadn't done any damage, but there was no sign of blood.

After disposing of the condom, I passed Dean the first thing I could find for him to clean up with – my discarded underwear. He wiped the mess off himself and tossed the briefs aside, then rolled towards me and pressed close.

I wasn't a cuddler. When I'd had people stay over in the past, I'd turned away after the deed was done and kept to my side of the bed. I didn't hesitate to slide my arms around Dean and hold him close. He kissed my neck and licked sweat from my skin.

"Are you okay?" I murmured.

"Yeah." He turned over so his back was to my chest, and gripped my arm, holding it tight around him the way he had that one night back in Mangrove River. I curled around him, pressing my face into his neck. It was different now. When I woke up in the morning, I wouldn't have to tell him nothing like this could ever happen again. My heartbeat gradually slowed, and I drifted into sleep.

When I stirred again, I expected to find Dean in my arms, my dick pressed against his arse, and his hand gripping mine, pushing it down to his erection. I frowned, then opened one eye. He wasn't there. The other side of my bed was disappointingly empty, and the sheets were cool. He'd been gone a while. I sat up and looked around for his clothes. Perhaps he'd just pulled on his jeans and gone to the shower and toilet block. But all his clothes were gone, and mine were scattered on the floor the way they'd fallen when we tore them off.

"Fuck," I muttered, irritated by how much my spirits fell. What did I think this was going to be? A full-on relationship? Something I'd been telling myself all along that I wasn't sure I wanted? The way Dean had been looking at me, I was sure he'd wanted it too. Yesterday had been like a date – dinner, kissing, sex, cuddling, falling asleep together. So why was he gone? He changed his mind? It had hurt, and he didn't want to do it again, but didn't know how to tell me? "Shit."

I dragged myself out of bed, found a pair of shorts, and went to the shower block to use the toilet. It was still early, and I decided to go for a surf and clear my head. Dean was probably on the beach anyway.

I caught a few waves, and didn't see another soul, except for Robbo running just as I was heading back to my van. He lifted a hand in greeting as he trotted by but didn't speak. I went to take a shower and put some clothes on, reminding myself I had work to do. I had a gym to run, and I needed to go and introduce myself to the trainers and figure out what changes I wanted to make.

I glanced over at Dean's van, wondering if he was in there. As tempted as I was to go over there and knock, I restrained myself. Maybe he wanted some space. How many times had I fucked someone and been desperate to get away? Even if I'd really enjoyed it. I could wait. I'd run into him later.

I didn't see him for several days and I knew by then he was avoiding me. I saw him leaving the diner once and was about to call out to him, but he hadn't seen me, and I didn't want to draw attention to us if he really didn't want to speak to me. I was furious with myself. I couldn't stop thinking about him, and I longed for a repeat of what we'd done, but he didn't seem to feel the same. What had I done wrong? Had he only wanted to experiment? Had he been longing to do it with me since he was sixteen, and now he had, it was over? A stupid picture of him sitting in his van came to mind. He had a notebook in front of him and a page of writing entitled "Dean's Bucket List." Number 1, "Fuck Heath Braxton." TICK.

"Fucking Christ," I muttered. He didn't want me. And here I was, hung up on him like he had been on me once. I sure as hell wasn't going to seek him out and talk to him about it. I'd make myself look like a dick.

Friday night I went into Salt to get a pizza and ordered a beer while I was waiting for it to cook. I leaned on the bar, glancing around at the other patrons and trying to stop myself wondering where Dean was. Instead, I eyed up a couple of girls sharing a table and weighed up my chances. They were a bit young, probably twenty-one or -two, but it might take my mind off him.

Who was I kidding? Nothing would take my mind off his hard body, gorgeous dick, and light green eyes gazing at me like the sun shone out of my arse. What the hell changed?

"Heath?"

I scowled and turned to look at Willow. "What?"

"I want to talk to you. It's about Dean."

"Here's your pizza. Enjoy." Brody placed a box on the counter. I nodded and picked it up.

"Outside," I said to Willow, and headed for the door, my pulse quickening.

"What did you do to him?" she demanded, the minute we left the building.

"What the hell do you mean by that?"

"I haven't seen him this miserable in a long time. He's always had a crush on you. _Always_. When you arrived last week, you were hanging out with him, even having dinner in here. Yes, I know, he told me. And then what?"

"What the fuck? What, nothing!" I exclaimed. "I haven't seen him all week."

"Why is that? What did you do?"

I gaped. "I don't know what the fuck you're talking about. He's been avoiding me."

Willow frowned. "Really? Because it seems to me like you're avoiding him."

"Well, I'm not. Did he tell you that?"

"No, he hasn't told me anything. I just… I suppose I assumed because you're not hanging out together and he's fucking miserable, Heath."

"That's not my fault." I scowled at her. "Mind your own fucking business." I headed back to my van, my appetite for the pizza gone. I placed it on the table in the van, then locked up again and headed over to Dean's. I needed to find out what was going on.

I knocked, waited, knocked again, then tried the door. It was locked and there was no sound from inside. Sighing, I headed for the beach, wondering if I'd find him there. Five minutes later, I came upon him walking in the edge of the tide, hands in his pockets and head down.

"Hey!"

He looked up, startled. "Heath."

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"Willow said something."

"What did she say?" His eyes narrowed.

"Just that you seemed… down."

"I'm fine."

I sighed. "Nothing you want to talk about?"

"No."

I hesitated. I was useless at this – talking about stuff. Bianca had always been irritated when I wouldn't tell her how I felt about things. I was reluctant to do it now, but I couldn't keep wondering.

"Why'd you leave on Monday night?" I asked.

"It was time to go." He shrugged. "It was good. I didn't want to outstay my welcome."

"You wouldn't have. It seems to me like you've been avoiding me the last few days."

Dean shrugged again. "We've both been busy."

"Bullshit. We live ten metres away from each other."

"Exactly. You could have knocked on my door if you wanted to see me." He looked up at me and raised an eyebrow. He was trying to act cocky, but the painful expression on his face was clear to see.

"So could you. You were the one who left in the middle of the night."

"I didn't want to still be there when you woke up and hear you tell me to fuck off," he blurted, then looked away quickly. "I, um, I thought you just wanted to fuck me and then, that's it."

"Dean…" I cleared my throat. "I care about you. You know that, don't you?"

"I suppose. I didn't think you wanted, um, a _thing_ with me, though."

I grinned. "What the hell is a _thing_?"

"Um, a date, a relationship. Whatever."

I felt like I was having to pry the words out of him and I smiled more. He was so like me in some ways. "Wasn't Monday a date? Dinner, sex, falling asleep together?"

"Yeah." His voice dropped almost to a whisper. "I didn't want that to end, so I left while it was still good."

"Fuck. You're an idiot, you know that?" I grabbed him by the shoulders and pulled him closer. "I wanted to wake up and kiss you. Kinda like this." I ducked my head and covered his mouth with mine.


	6. Chapter 6

CHAPTER SIX

Dean pressed against me and slid his arms around my back. The kiss deepened, our tongues meeting and lips crushed together. My dick filled, and his hardness nudged against mine. My heart thundered in my chest, and a sense of exhilaration rushed through me. I didn't think about what was happening to me – I just poured myself into the kiss; into him. I slid a hand down to his arse and pulled him tighter against me, gyrating my hips to get some friction. He braced a hand against my chest and tore his lips from mine.

"We'd better not do this here," he said breathlessly.

"Fuck," I muttered. He was right. I was so turned on I could barely think. I wanted to drag him down onto the sand and rip his clothes off. I wanted, no, needed, to feel his skin against mine, his dick against mine. I shuddered and took a step away. "You want to go back to my van?"

"Yeah."

"And don't fucking leave in the middle of the night," I growled as we began to walk back to the caravan park.

Dean laughed. "I won't. If you want rid of me, you can kick me out."

I reached out and draped my arm around his neck as we walked. I didn't give a shit if anyone saw us and nor, apparently, did Dean, as he tucked a hand into the back pocket of my jeans. As we left the beach, we passed Willow and Justin walking hand in hand. Justin's eyebrows shot up towards his hairline. Willow glanced at Dean and smiled.

"What the hell is going on with them?" I heard Justin say to Willow, not too quietly, as we moved away from them.

"Hey, Willow!" I called over my shoulder. "Thanks!"

Dean chuckled. "Work is going to be interesting from now on."

"Should I not…?" I made to pull my arm from around his neck, but he grasped my wrist and held it in place.

"I don't care."

"Good." I pressed a kiss to his temple and steered him towards my van.

A couple of hours later, we lay in a tangle of limbs, spent and sweaty. We'd sucked each other, then got each other worked up all over again and I fucked him. The van reeked of sweat and sex, but I hadn't wanted to open the window while we were doing it. We weren't quiet, and chances are, people would have heard us even with the windows closed.

"I need a shower," Dean murmured, not moving.

"So do I." I laughed. "So do the sheets." There was a wet patch under my hip from where Dean had come when I was fucking him. How did I end up in the wet patch?

"We should get up."

"Yeah. In a minute." I nuzzled his neck. My body didn't want to move anymore. I closed my eyes. Just a few more minutes.

When I opened my eyes, it was daylight and Dean was still there, wrapped around me with his face in my armpit. I grinned. He didn't leave.

He stirred a moment later and lifted his head. "Hey."

"You're still here then."

He moved against me and his morning erection nudged my leg. "I thought we might have time for another round before you go to the gym."

I glanced at my watch, which showed me it was approaching five. We had time. "Get up here." I rolled onto my back and urged him to get on top of me. He straddled me, trapping my dick under him where it pushed against his balls. "Here." I gripped his arse and pulled him forward, not caring that he was sweaty from sleeping and hadn't showered after we had sex last night. "Fuck my mouth."

"Fuck." Dean crawled forward until his knees rested either side of my shoulders, spread wide. He angled his dick down towards my lips and I captured it in one hand, and my own in the other. He slid into my mouth about half way, then paused. I released him and put my hand on his hip, encouraging him to move. I'd never done anything like this, but there was so much I wanted to do with him, and we had time, now we'd decided it wasn't a one-time thing.

Dean began to buck his hips, shallow thrusts so only half his length filled my mouth. I slipped my hand under him and pressed inside with two fingers, finding him still wet from the lube we'd used hours before. He groaned and jerked, and the head of his cock bumped the back of my throat. I swallowed and breathed through my nose. I didn't have much of a gag reflex and found I could take it without too much difficulty. I pulled my knees up and jerked myself harder. One day soon I planned to get him to fuck me. He'd loved it last night. He'd been more relaxed, and it had been apparent that I hadn't hurt him. I wanted to know what his dick felt like in me.

"Shit!" Dean came, flooding my mouth and throat. On my back, it was harder to take it all. I spluttered, and fluid leaked from the corners of my mouth. He pulled out quickly. "Sorry."

I shook my head. "Don't matter. Stay there." Panting and licking my lips, I brought myself to the finish.

"Damn it, Heath. You bastard." Laughing, Dean crawled off me and found an item of clothing to wipe my mess off his back.

I snorted. "I need to get a proper place to live. Like yesterday."

"I thought you cleaned yourself out buying the gym." Dean pulled on his underwear and reached for his cut-offs.

"Yeah. I meant, using the shower block is a pain in the arse. I'd rather be sharing my own shower with you."

"Me too." He shoved his feet into his sneakers and opened the door.

"Where the hell are you going?"

"I need a piss."

I groaned and rolled over as he closed the door behind him. I was starting to feel that way too, and I was desperate to shower, and I was starving. I hauled myself up and began to get dressed, munching on slices of cold pizza as I did so. Then I grabbed a towel, toiletries, and clean underwear, and headed to the shower block.

Dean wasn't there, and I guessed he must have gone back to his van to get some things. I took a piss, dumped my clothes on one of the benches in the changing area, and went to shower in the end cubicle. By the time I was under the hot spray of water, my dick was half hard again and all I could think about was showering with Dean – washing each other, rubbing against each other, me turning him to face the wall and fucking him while the water poured down on us.

I began to soap myself up with shower gel, biting my lip to suppress a groan as I washed between my legs. I hadn't been so constantly horny in a long time. It was less than fifteen minutes since I came and I was ready to go again.

The outer door banged open and squeaked closed again, and the slap of flip flops on the tiles headed towards the changing area. I rinsed myself, listening hard as the owner of the flip flops unzipped something, dropped things on the bench, and padded barefoot towards the cubicles. I unlocked my door and opened it a crack. Dean, with a towel around his waist.

"Get in here." I opened the door wider and he stepped in, quickly shedding the towel.

"No one else is out there," he said.

"Good." I locked the door, grabbed him by the hips, and shoved him against the wall as I covered his mouth with mine. He groaned and slid a hand between us to grasp my erection and rub it against his own thickening cock. I broke the kiss and worked my way down the side of his neck, nipping his skin.

"Fuck," he gasped. "Can't you get enough?"

"No. You turn me on so fucking much."

He moved his hand faster, jerking us together. "Don't you have to go to work?"

"Yeah," I panted. "But this isn't gonna take long."

Dean chuckled and tightened his grip. My idea of a long, sexy shower went out the window. I just wanted to come, and fast. My balls pulled up and I rolled my hips, shoving my dick harder into his fist and against his shaft. He blew a second before I did, a lesser amount then usual, as it was such a short time since we'd fooled around in my van. I followed him with a deep groan that must have been heard by whoever opened the door to the block at that moment.

Grinning, I pried myself off Dean and grabbed the shower gel again. We both used mine, then my shampoo. Another time, we'd do this and I'd relish washing him from head to foot, teasing him until he was begging me to get him off. We rinsed, then Dean wrapped his towel around his waist and opened the door. I hadn't brought my towel with me, but at least I wasn't hard anymore. I waited a minute, as if that would make a difference.

"Hey," I heard Dean say.

There was a pause. "All right, mate."

"Been running?"

"Yeah."

"Bathroom at home busy, is it?" Dean teased. I immediately realised the newcomer was Robbo.

"Yeah, Colby brought a girl home last night. Thought I'd get out of the way."

I slipped out of the shower and went to join them. "Morning, Robbo."

His eyes widened, and his mouth dropped open, before he shut it quickly and tried to look as if he wasn't shocked that we were both there and only one shower had been occupied. I smirked and picked up my towel.

"Heath." He nodded, glanced at Dean, then back at me.

"Um, you, um…"

"Yeah," Dean supplied, grinning as Robbo squirmed, clearly realising what the groan he'd heard had meant. "We're together."

"Oh! Well, um, good, I guess." He took a towel and toiletries out of a sports bag. "So, Heath, you bought the gym."

I'd had it for a week, but I hadn't seen him to talk to. "Yeah."

"Congratulations."

"Thanks." I don't know what I'd expected. He wasn't the kind of guy who'd say something like, "I was planning to buy that, you bastard."

"Making some changes already." He nodded and smiled. "It could do with some more life putting into it. Well, um…" He glanced at Dean again, who had dropped his towel and was pulling on clean underwear. "I guess I'll leave you to it."

I chuckled as he left us and hurried away to one of the showers – not the one we'd been in. Dean grinned. We finished drying and dressing, and parted company before we reached the vans. I'd stuffed myself with cold pizza, but Dean wanted to go to the diner for some breakfast. Then he had a few hours of community service to do. He still hadn't told me why he'd been in prison before, and I wondered about it. What had he done back then that got him locked up? I had no intention of going behind his back and asking Willow. I doubted she'd tell me anyway, but maybe he would, given enough time.

I spent the day at the gym, spotting a few guys lifting weights, and ordering some new aerobics equipment. I'd arranged for a new instructor to start work, as well as allocating extra shifts to Willow, and the classes were to start in a week's time. People came and went all day, and in the afternoon, I found myself spotting Robbo as he bench-pressed something close to my body weight. I wasn't a small guy, but he was huge. About my height, but broader, heavier, and more muscular.

"I heard you were thinking about buying the gym yourself," I commented.

"Yeah," he huffed as he lowered the bar for the last time and I guided it into its brackets. He sat up. "Thanks. I don't have the experience, though. You'll do a better job than I would, I'm sure."

He was a decent guy, I realised. I wouldn't have been so friendly to someone who'd beaten me to something I wanted.

"So. You and Dean." He stood up and raised an eyebrow. A grin pulled his lips up at the corners.

"Yeah. We've known each other a long time. He was mates with my little brother back in Mangrove River."

"You were married though, right?"

"Divorced now. I'm bi," I added.

"Sorry. I'm not meaning to pry. Just surprised, I guess. I mean, I know Dean's gay. Just didn't expect one of the Braxtons to be."

"Oh, you've heard of me then?" I grinned.

"About eight or nine years ago, I was after your, um, employer." He winked.

"Um, what?" I frowned, thinking back eight or nine years. Shit. I was dealing.

"It's okay. You were too small a fish to bother with. Besides, I'm an _ex_ -Fed, remember?" He snorted. "Clearly it wasn't a long-term occupation."

"No. My brother found out and kicked the shit out of me."

"Oh, yes. Darrell Braxton. Where's he now?"

"The States. Why?"

"Just interested. I heard what happened. Wasn't on my watch, though."

"He was cleared," I pointed out.

"I know. It's habit. Asking a lot of questions. I don't mean anything by it. I'll let you get on." He smiled and nodded, then left the gym.

I raised my eyebrows. He was friendly, and no longer in the force, but I still felt like I'd been interrogated. It always made me feel guilty, which was no doubt a result of my younger years. I didn't have enough fingers to count the number of times I'd been arrested, or at least questioned.

I hadn't made arrangements to see Dean later, but after I'd been to the diner for some food, I decided to go to his van and see if he was there. At least we were on the same page now, so knocking on his door wasn't going to be bother me. I knocked, waited a moment, then knocked again and peered through the window. All I could see was the little kitchen-diner area. I tried the door and it opened.

"Dean?"

"Yeah. In here." I climbed the steps and closed the door. Immediately, I saw him lying on his bed, wearing only his underwear. A smile spread across my face as I imagined he was waiting for me like that. I grasped the hem of my T-shirt ready to pull it off as I made my way to the bed but stopped when I took a proper look at him.

"What the fuck happened?" A bruise spread across his left cheekbone, and his lower lip was split and swollen. The shadow of another larger bruise showed on his left side. The knuckles on both hands were grazed, indicating he'd been fighting and wasn't simply the victim of a beating. My eyes narrowed. "What did you do?"


	7. Chapter 7

CHAPTER 7

"Oh, it's my fault?" Dean scowled and sat up. He flinched and moved a hand towards his bruised ribs, then checked himself.

"Are you badly hurt?"

"Just bruised."

"So, was it your fault?" I sat on the bed and reached for his hand, but he pulled away.

"I just escaped a fucking jail sentence by the skin of my teeth. I'm on a good behaviour bond. So no, it wasn't my fault."

"Sorry. You gonna tell me what happened?"

"If you're not gonna fucking judge me." Dean's sour, sulky expression reminded me of the way he'd looked as a kid the day Brax told him we'd take care of him but that he had to go back to school.

"I'm not judging you. I'm concerned about you."

"One of the guys who's doing community service was in prison with me. He's been waiting for the chance to catch me alone. We got into it on the beach after we finished picking litter."

"What's his problem?"

"I wouldn't let him fuck me when we were inside. He's about the same size as me, so it wasn't that hard to fight him off. In fact, he came off worst a couple of times. He thought he'd get his own back on me."

"Shit," I muttered.

"Don't worry about it. I can handle it."

"Can you?"

"I'm not a kid anymore, Heath. I don't need you to take care of me."

"What if I want to?"

"Just stay out of it. It's dealt with."

"Okay." I sighed, keen to wade in and give whoever the other guy was a good kicking, but Dean would only be more pissed at me. I changed tack. "So, what were you inside for?"

"I wondered when we were going to get to that."

"Like I said before, you don't have to tell me. I'm just nosy, I guess."

Dean huffed out a breath. "I stole a car. Crashed it. Colby was with me. He was training to be a cop, so I took the heat. The whole thing got messy. I almost died and when I could walk again…"

"Fuck!" I hissed. "It was that bad?"

"Yeah, it was bad. I was in a wheelchair a few months. I had to go to court during that time, and I got a year's sentence, but they delayed it until I was on my feet. Bastards. I served the full term. I would have got out sooner, except for the fighting." He forced a grin. "So now you know."

"Christ." I moved closer and took his hand. This time he didn't pull away. "Why didn't you get in touch? I never changed my number. I told you when we left you could call if you needed me. Us."

"I was doing okay when you left. Later, I didn't want you to see what a mess I was."

"It wouldn't have mattered."

Dean shook his head. "I almost called. I was twenty. But I didn't want you to be disappointed."

"I wouldn't have been." I slid my arms around him and stroked my hands over his back.

"You'd have been married then."

"It wouldn't have mattered," I repeated. "I'd have been there."

He returned my hug and held on tight. "What now?"

"I'm not going anywhere."

I stayed in his van that night. We jerked each other off, but that was as far as it went. His mouth and his ribs were sore, so mostly we just snuggled together, not even talking. Neither of us were great at talking. I wanted to, but I couldn't think of anything to say. Neither, apparently, could Dean. At least he'd told me what he'd so far avoided talking about.

The thought of him in jail stung me. A year inside with some arsehole trying to have sex with him, Dean fighting him off, more than once, and ruining his chances of getting out early. I wanted to kill the guy who'd done it and I forced myself to settle down. There was no point getting worked up over it. Dean had already told me not to interfere and I'd talked myself out of it, but it didn't anger me any less.

When I woke, Dean was dressed and about to head for the showers. I left him and went back to my own van to get ready for work.

Over the next few days we fell into a routine, eating together at Salt or buying food to eat at one of the vans, then spending the nights together. We fooled around plenty but didn't fuck. Dean's bruised ribs were healing, but he still winced every now and then.

I didn't know if any of the other locals suspected what was going on between us. Robbo wasn't a gossip, and clearly neither were Willow and Justin. Dean said Justin hadn't said anything at work and suspected he was embarrassed by the situation. I would have thought if anyone else had found out it would have got back to Irene and she certainly would have said something, but she seemed oblivious.

Darcy called on Saturday after I finished at the gym. I hadn't talked to the kids since the previous weekend and it was great to hear her voice as she babbled about school, her best friend, Harley, and how much she missed me.

"When can we come and visit, Dad?" she asked plaintively. "I like Summer Bay. You promised you'd teach me to surf when I was older. I _am_ older."

"Just a few more weeks," I said. "I'm living in a caravan right now. I'll have a house soon, then you and Harley can come and stay."

That appeased her, and she asked more about the people she remembered from the Bay. Then she put Harley on the phone and I talked to my son for a few minutes before he got bored and passed me back to Darce.

"Mum's got a boyfriend," she said in a conspiratorial whisper. "I'm not supposed to say."

I chuckled. "It's okay, I won't say anything."

"Aren't you sad? Or mad?"

"No. I want your mum to be happy, okay? Is he nice?"

"Yes, he's nice. He's a teacher."

"Okay…" Bianca had mentioned a couple of new teachers starting work at her school and I wondered if her new man was one of them. A few weeks ago, I would have been pissed that she'd taken up with someone else, but all I could think about right now was Dean. I wondered how the kids would take it – Daddy having a boyfriend. I wasn't about to tell her; not yet. I thought I'd let them meet Dean first and see if they liked him. I could say he was a friend I'd known back in Mangrove River, which was true.

"I gotta go. Mum's making dinner," Darcy said.

"Okay, sweetheart. I'll talk to you soon. I love you," I said.

"Love you, too, Dad." She hung up.

I headed for the showers, intending to scrub up and change into something smart for a meal at Salt. I wondered if Brody suspected anything. Dean and I weren't very good at keeping our hands off each other under the table.

As I dried and dressed after my shower, I heard voices outside the window – two guys talking, not loudly, but loud enough to be heard through the partly open pane. When I heard the name "Thompson" mentioned, I paid attention.

"That bastard's going to get what's coming to him," the other voice said. "He got the better of me a couple of times in jail."

"What about your parole? If you get in more trouble you could go down for another stretch."

"When I'm finished with him, he won't be capable of telling anyone. I'm gonna fuck him, then beat the crap out of him. Or the other way around. Wanna help?"

"I'm not into that gay shit."

"I didn't say you had to fuck him as well."

I didn't wait to hear anymore. Blood boiling, I ran barefoot out of the shower block. I had my underwear and a shirt on. The two guys were still there, and I recognised one from when I'd seen the group doing their community service. I launched myself at them, dispatching the other guy first with a punch in the face, before I turned to the one that had been in prison with Dean – the one that intended to hurt him.

"Who the fuck are you?" he demanded.

"Your worst nightmare." My fist landed in his mouth before he could block it, knocking out a couple of teeth. Blood flew, and he retaliated, catching me in the ribs before I could dodge. The little bastard had fists like steel and my breath wheezed out of me. _Come on, Heath, get it together._

I swung and missed. When I aimed again with the other fist, it crashed into the side of his head and knocked him sideways. He stumbled and saved himself with one hand on the ground. My bare foot connected with his stomach, winding him, and when he raised his head, blood streaming down his chin, I kicked him in the face. He went down. I dropped to my knees, gripped the front of his shirt, and slammed my fist into his nose. It broke with an audible crack, and more blood poured out. He choked and spluttered, made a feeble attempt to fight back, and landed a punch with no more impact than Darce would manage. I raised my fist to finish the job and found myself grabbed under the armpits and dragged to my feet.

"Heath, stop. You're gonna land yourself in jail," Robbo said in my ear.

"I'm gonna fucking kill him," I spat, struggling to get free.

"No, you're not. Leave it." He began to drag me away. "Where are your clothes? In there?" He jerked his head towards the shower block.

"Yeah." I finally shook him off me. The guy lay on the ground, bleeding and coughing. His mate knelt beside him, a phone to his ear.

"We need to get out of here. Now." Robbo propelled me back into the building, waited a second while I gathered up my stuff, then marched me back to my van. "What the hell was that about?"

"It's none of your business," I gritted out. "You're an _ex_ -cop, remember?"

"I'm also a witness."

"Gonna grass me up?"

"No. Like you said, it's not my business. But if you get hauled into the police station, you might _want_ a witness. So, I need to know if I should defend you or pretend I didn't see anything."

"Fuck," I muttered.

"Is this anything to do with Dean?"

"He wouldn't want me telling you his business."

"So, it is, then. Anything to do with him and that guy scrapping recently?"

"You know about that?"

"Yeah. I saw it. Come on, Heath. What's going on?"

"That fucking arsehole gave Dean a hard time in jail." I bit my lip. Did Robbo even know Dean had been in jail? Probably. "Those two were outside the shower block, talking about how they were gonna…" I broke off, breathing hard and clenching my fists. I was tempted to run back out there and finish what I started.

"Gonna what?" Robbo prompted.

"Fuck him and then kick the shit out of him." I wiped the spittle off my lips with the back of my hand. My jaw twitched in anger and the veins in my arms popped as I clenched my fists harder.

"Settle down. You don't want to go back to the place you were in eight or nine years ago."

"I don't give a fuck," I growled.

"Well, I'm sure Dean would care."

"Dean would care about what?" Dean said from the open door.

"Shit," I muttered.

"Is this about whoever it is you're seeing behind my back, Heath?"

"I… what?" I stared at him, stunned. My shock surpassed my rage and my hands relaxed. "What the hell are you talking about?"

"Whoever it was you had on the phone earlier. Sounded pretty cosy. 'Sweetheart, I'll talk to you soon. I love you?' And why the fuck are you talking to him about it?" He glanced at Robbo and scowled more.

"I should probably, um…" Robbo sidled to the door.

"You stay where you are." Dean glowered at him. "I want to know what's going on." He looked me up and down, then stared hard at my hands. I knew my knuckles were split and bleeding, but I didn't follow his gaze.

"I was talking to my daughter," I said through my teeth. "Darcy was asking when she can come and visit. You could have just asked me, instead of listening outside the door, making up some shit in your head, and leaving."

"Oh. I'm… I'm sorry." Dean shook his head. He looked back at Robbo. "So, what were you talking about when I arrived just now?"

"You gonna tell him?" Robbo met my gaze questioningly.

Before I could open my mouth, sirens could be heard screaming towards the caravan park. Dean turned to look out of the door and I watched over his shoulder as an ambulance pulled up by the shower block.

"I got in a fight," I said.

"I'll leave you to it." Robbo squeezed past Dean to the door. "Heath, let me know if anything comes of this, yeah?"

"Okay. Thanks." He closed the door behind him.

Dean turned to face me. "I'm sorry I got the wrong idea about your phone call."

"So am I." I was still mad. I hated when people didn't trust me. "I don't fuck around, Dean. If I'm with someone, it doesn't even enter my head to fool around with anyone else."

"I'm sorry," he said again. "Are you gonna tell me what the fight was about?"

"I…" A knock on the door interrupted me. "Fuck," I muttered, and stepped past Dean to open it. Colby stood there in his police uniform.

"Hey," Dean said. Colby ignored him and stared at me.

"You didn't waste any time," I muttered.

"I need you to come to the station with me, Heath."

"Can't we do this here?"

"I'm afraid not. I need to obtain an official statement from you. You're being accused of assault."

"By whom?"

"A Mr Andrew Martin and a Mr Jason Smith."

Dean sucked in a breath. "What the fuck, Heath? I told you to stay out of it!"

"I couldn't," I began. "They were talking…" I broke off. I didn't want to have that conversation with him in front of Colby. I needed to do some fast thinking if I wanted to get out of this. I didn't regret what I'd done for one second, but I could have fucked up everything for myself. Brax was thousands of miles away. He wasn't there to sort out my crap anymore, and besides, I was old enough to figure it out on my own. If I didn't, I could end up losing Dean, and not getting to see Darce and Harley for a long time.


	8. Chapter 8

CHAPTER EIGHT

"You need to come down to the station," Colby reminded me.

"Give us a minute," Dean told him.

"Yeah, at least let me put some clothes on," I grumbled, indicating I still wore only underwear and a shirt.

"Fine. I'll wait out here." Colby stepped away.

Dean closed the door and glowered. "What the hell? I told you not to interfere."

"I wasn't going to. I was in the shower room and I heard them outside the window, talking about what they were planning to do to you."

"I said I could handle it."

"With two of them? The guy you were inside with was saying he planned to fuck you and kick the shit out of you, not necessarily in that order. You expect me to ignore that?"

Dean blanched and shook his head.

"Look, Robbo saw most of it. He said he'd be a witness for me. Do you have his number?"

"Yeah." Dean pulled out his phone.

I took the phone and opened the messages. "Better not do this from my phone." I tapped out a quick text to Robbo, telling him it was me and that I planned to tell the cops I'd confronted the two guys over what they said, they laid into me at the same time, and my part was self-defence. "Not sure it'll wash," I told Dean. "I, um, I half killed the guy." I looked down at my hands, which were not only bruised and torn, but spattered with blood from my victim. "I need to clean up."

"I'm sorry," Dean said. "For having a go at you. I'm just not used to having someone in my life like this. Back when I was a kid, it was different."

"I know. You'd better get used to it, 'cause I'm not going anywhere." I turned to the sink to wash my hands, then peeled off the shirt which had gathered a few droplets of blood. I put on some fresh clothes. Dean's phone beeped, and he held it up for me to read the message.

 _On my way. Will say I saw the whole thing. You were talking to them. They jumped you. You fought back._

 _Thank you_ , I sent back. "Who is this guy, Robbo?" I asked Dean. "He doesn't know me. He wanted the gym, and I bought it. He's an ex-cop, supposedly a law-abiding citizen, and he's potentially gonna lie to the cops for me."

"He's been through a lot of shit himself," Dean said. "And he's my mate, kind of. I don't suppose he wants to see me get into any more trouble if you get taken away from me."

Suddenly realising I could have dropped myself in it right then by what I said to him, I glanced out the window. I was rattled and not thinking straight. If Colby heard what I said…

Colby was maybe thirty meters away by his car, leaning against the door with his arms folded. I heaved a sigh of relief. "Okay. I'd better do this." I reached out to pull Dean towards me, half expecting him to move away, but he pressed against me.

"I'll go with you."

"No, you won't." I brushed my lips over his. "You didn't see anything, and they won't believe what you say anyway. Of course you're gonna want to defend me. But Robbo has no reason to, so they'll believe him."

"Okay." Dean returned my kiss and I hugged him tighter. I didn't want to be fighting with him, and the last ten minutes or so had seemed to be heading in that direction.

"Delete your phone messages," I reminded him.

"Already done." He showed me the phone, the message section showing only exchanges with me, Willow, Colby, and Justin.

"See you soon." I opened the door and strode across the grass to Colby's car. "You want me to sit in the back?" I offered.

"It's not necessary." He opened the driver's door and left me to get in myself, for which I was grateful. I didn't particularly want any of my gym patrons or friends to see me apparently getting arrested after only being back a couple of weeks. "So, off the record…" Colby turned the car onto the road and began to drive towards Yabbie Creek. "What happened? I'm well aware one of those guys you beat up was in prison with Dean."

"Yeah. You know about me and Dean, right?" I asked.

"You knew him in Mangrove River, before I met him."

"I mean now."

Colby glanced at me, puzzled.

I grinned. "You don't know? I thought it might have got out by now. Me and Dean are together."

"Are you serious?" Colby's eyes widened. "He hasn't said anything."

"No one around here really knows I'm bi. He probably didn't want to out me."

"He always used to talk about you after you left Mangrove River." Colby turned his attention back to the road. "He said you and your brothers took care of him for a while after his mother disappeared."

"Yeah."

"You were his hero."

I snorted. "I would have been more than that if he'd been over eighteen."

"Shit." Colby shook his head. "How old were you?"

"Twenty-three. He was sixteen. I don't class that as being a minor, when the only thing you can't do is vote, but your lot wouldn't have looked on it favourably if we'd done anything. I kept my distance. Things are different now. I always cared about him, though." I don't know why I told him that. Maybe because he cared about Dean and it might show me in a better light.

"Okay. So what happened today?"

"I'd rather wait until we're at the station or I'm gonna have to go over the whole thing again."

"Well, I'd rather you tell me now. I can't overlook this, Heath, but I don't want to cause Dean any more grief if it can be avoided."

"What are you saying? You're expecting the story to be different here than it will at the station?" I glanced at him, incredulous. I doubted he was trying to make me drop myself in the shit, but even so, I had no intention of doing so. "It won't be. It's simple. I was in the shower block and I heard those two guys outside the window, talking. One of them mentioned the name Thompson. He was mad about Dean getting the better of him in prison, and the other day in a fight. He said he was going to fuck Dean and kick the shit out of him."

Colby winced. "That must have made you mad."

"Obviously. The guy was going to get his friend to help, at least with the beating. I went outside to confront them. I was mad, but I don't want to cause trouble for myself around here. I just bought a business. I was going to let them know Dean wasn't alone and that they wouldn't get near him."

"Right?" Colby nodded and glanced at me to prompt me to continue.

"I recognised one of them from the community service group, so I knew it was the right guy. I told them I heard what they said and that they should know I'd come and find them if they hurt Dean. Next thing I knew, he threw a punch and his mate came at me from the other side."

"You got hit?"

"Yeah, I dodged the first punch, but I got hit here." I indicated the side of my stomach and pulled up my shirt. To my relief, a dark patch had formed to confirm it.

"Then what?"

"I wasn't gonna just stand there and take that shit from them. I threw one punch at the mate and he backed off. The other one kept mouthing off about how I couldn't be watching every minute and he'd get Dean as soon as my back was turned. I hit him in the mouth twice and he went down. Then Robbo came and told me I'd better stop, or I was gonna end up in trouble myself. He said he'd seen what happened."

Colby nodded. "To be honest, this is the sort of thing I'd expect from Jason Smith. Did Dean tell you what happened in prison?"

"Not in a lot of detail."

"The guy tried to rape him, several times. He doesn't think I know. We weren't friends after he got out, but a few weeks ago we were talking. He'd had a lot to drink. Things were going to shit for him, he was scared about getting sent down again, and he spilled out a lot of things he wouldn't have done if he'd been sober. Dean fought Smith off every time when they were in jail, then ended up solitary."

"He told me that."

"Smith is the type that holds a grudge. He'd have been waiting for a chance to get his own back, so I can believe what you've just told me. Obviously, you have to make an official statement, but tell it the same way you just told me." Colby eyed me again and grinned. "You made quite a mess of him. More than would be needed in self-defence."

"Probably. Sometimes I don't know my own strength." I didn't smile. I couldn't quite believe Colby was essentially saying he knew there was more to it, but he was going to overlook it.

"So, did Robbo really see it all?" he asked.

"He said he did. I don't know, I was kind of busy."

"Well, he was a cop, you know. He'll tell it like he saw it. It'll be your word against theirs, but no one will trust what they say. The only thing going against you will be the amount of damage you did to Smith's face."

I didn't know Colby well enough to trust him, but I remembered he'd been a River Boy and if that had meant anything to him, his loyalty to Dean, and to me as well, would be important to him.

When we arrived at the station, Colby turned professional again, booked me in and took me to an interview room. He asked a series of questions which I was familiar with from the number of times I'd done this before. Then I told the story again almost word for word. An hour later, Colby left me alone and went to speak with a colleague. Statements had been taken from Smith and his mate, which were pretty different from mine. However, their story was clearly wildly exaggerated, which had led to Colby's colleague suspecting most of the description had been made up. The fact that I was a business owner and had managed to escape my twenties without a criminal record went in my favour.

Colby returned to tell me Robbo was in the waiting room and that he was going to interview him. I went out to the waiting room and Robbo took my place. He was out again within half an hour and Colby told me I could leave.

"Thanks," I said as we got into Robbo's car to travel back to the Bay.

"No problem."

"Colby was on our side from the start," I added.

"I thought he might be. Despite them having a few years of not speaking, Colby's always been loyal to Dean. They were pretty close friends after your family left Mangrove River, from what I've heard."

"Yeah. Colby was a River Boy before he was a cop. That means whatever he feels about Dean extends to me, regardless of what me and Dean are to each other."

"So, is that it?" Robbo asked. "You're off the hook?"

"Not yet. That Smith guy might press charges, but his statement was so over the top they don't believe it, so I don't think much will come of it."

By the time we got back to the caravan park it was pretty late and I was starving. There was no question of going out for a meal at Salt now, but I invited Robbo to join us for dinner the next day as a thank you. The door to my van was unlocked the way I'd left it, and when I stepped inside, I found Dean in my bed, not sleeping, but waiting for me. A brown paper bag of food sat on the small table.

"How did it go?" he sat up, anxiety written all over his face.

"It's fine. Colby's pretty loyal. He said as much before we got to the station. He had to do things officially and he took a statement from Robbo, but he'll make it go away as much as he can."

"Thank God." Dean rubbed his hands over his face. "Are you hungry? I got some food from Salt."

"Starving. Thanks." I kicked off my shoes and peeled off my shirt, then sat down to eat. Dean joined me.

"I haven't had anything. Too worried." He smiled and rolled his eyes. I leaned in and kissed him. Our lips clung for a long moment, before we broke away and dug into the food.

Dean's phone beeped, and he checked the text message, then chuckled. He turned the phone around so I could see the message from Colby. _You and Braxton? You're a dark horse._

I laughed. "I told him. Is that okay? I thought if he knew about us he might be more amenable. He's loyal to you."

"Yeah, I know." He traced a finger over my Blood and Sand tattoo. "He will be to you too, now. He got in a lot of shit when the force found out he'd been a River Boy. Suspended and interrogated over it due to his supposed gang affiliation."

"We're not a gang, we're family."

"Hell, we all know that. Sergeant McCarthur wasn't convinced. Colby's still kind of on probation."

"He's a decent guy." I crammed a piece of fried chicken into my mouth. "I just remembered. I invited Robbo to have dinner with us at Salt tomorrow. Kind of a thanks for what he did today."

"Okay, that's cool. You want this?" Dean offered me the last piece of chicken.

We finished the meal with a couple of beers, then took a quick trip to the toilet block before falling into bed. I couldn't wait to get a proper place to live. Walking across the park every time I needed a piss or a clean-up was getting to be a real pain in the arse.


	9. Chapter 9

CHAPTER NINE

The next evening, we ate dinner at Salt with Robbo. We talked about the gym a fair bit and when I realised he did odd jobs for Alf but was mostly at a loose end, I offered him work as a part-time trainer. He didn't have any qualifications and wasn't experienced, but he'd done plenty of weight training and was well used to all the machines. I was concerned the offer might come across as patronising, but he accepted it.

"That'd be cool. I get to work there, earn some extra cash, and not have the responsibility of it all going down the toilet, which it probably would have if I'd bought it. I fancied having a go, but seriously, you're welcome to it."

We toasted to his new job and agreed for him to start on Monday. He'd have to be "trained" and "examined" by me and obtain a suitable training certificate, but it was merely paperwork to satisfy the powers that be.

Colby came into the restaurant to grab a pizza, and Dean waved him over to the table. "Wanna join us?"

"He might not want to be seen out with two River Boys." I grinned, but Colby smiled and sat down.

"I can eat dinner with my housemate," he said, indicating Robbo. "You two criminals just happen to be here too."

I found Colby to be a decent guy, too. I had nothing much against cops, unless they were after my tail, and Colby hinted that nothing further would come of my fight with Jason Smith, and that the guy had deserved everything he got. I remembered that Colby had been a friend to Dean after I left Mangrove River, and for that alone I could like the guy.

We all stayed at the table, making our way through Salt's beer supply, until Brody came over to collect the empties and told us he needed to lock up. Colby and Robbo went to their apartment and Dean and I made our way back to the caravan park. We took a quick trip into the toilet block first.

"Yours or mine?" I asked as we came out.

"Yours." Dean slid his hand into my pocket to find my key. The heat of his hand on my thigh as he groped for the key made my blood rush to my groin.

"Jesus." I grasped his wrist and yanked his hand out of my pocket.

Dean laughed and held up the key. "Such an innocent touch and you're all wound up already."

"Innocent, bullshit." I gave him a shove and he staggered sideways. "And yeah, I'm wound up. Been thinking about trying something new."

"Oh, yeah?" Dean unlocked the door to my van and sprang up the steps.

I followed and closed the door behind me. I peeled off my shirt and tossed it into a corner. Distracted, Dean kicked off his shoes and unfastened his jeans. Eyes fixed on my bare chest, he stripped off jeans and underwear, freeing his erection.

"Look who else is wound up." I paused in unfastening my fly and reached out to run my finger along the underside of his shaft. It twitched, and Dean hissed through his teeth.

"So, you gonna share with me?" Dean pulled off his shirt and threw himself onto my bed.

Grinning, I ditched the last of my clothes and opened the drawer in the cabinet beside the bed, steeling myself against the tremor in my hand. I'd been thinking about it over the past few days with a mixture of excitement and nervousness. Heath Braxton didn't do nervous, but I was about this. I found a condom and tossed it to Dean. "Put this on."

"Serious?" His eyes widened.

"Yeah."

"Fuck."

I grinned wider, shaking off my nerves. "That's the idea."

Ignoring the condom, Dean grabbed the lube and moved closer to me. I expected him to coat his fingers and go at it immediately, but instead, he bent and drew me into his mouth. I groaned and closed my eyes. He worked me with his mouth and hand, slow and steady, tormenting me as my desire ramped up. I was too turned on to worry about it anymore. His fingers wouldn't be any different than my own, and his dick – well, he'd been able to take mine well enough. I wanted it, and the more he sucked and stroked, the less I could wait.

"Come on," I muttered. "Prep me."

"Don't be so impatient. I'm not gonna rush." Dean moved over me and pressed a knee between mine.

I spread my legs and pulled my knees up. "You're gonna have to stop sucking me or I'll come," I said through my teeth.

He laughed. "I'm sure you can shoot more than once."

I took a deep breath, then another, trying to slow things down as he took his hand off me. The next touch I felt was a cool slick finger sliding over the ridge behind my balls, feeling for my hole. Anticipation made me shudder, and I gasped as he found his target and pressed gently. The tip of his finger slid in, not far enough to breach my ring.

"Yeah," I whispered. "More."

He pressed in, curling his finger at the same time and easily finding my prostate. I began to pant noisily, soft moans issuing from my lips. The desperate sounds almost embarrassed me, but I couldn't hold them in. Dean chuckled and added a second finger.

"Stop fucking laughing," I grumbled.

"I'm not laughing at you. I just love that you're so into this. I used to dream about you fucking me when I was a kid. Never thought it could ever be the other way around."

I opened my eyes and met his. "I wouldn't do it with anyone else."

"I hope not!" Dean curled his fingers up and I arched my back, my dick jerking against my stomach.

"Shit! Get in me already."

"I'm taking it slow. Remember my first time? I'm not gonna rush, or you won't be able to sit down in the morning. What would your gym bunnies think?"

I snorted, then winced as I involuntarily clenched around his knuckles. I breathed out and relaxed again, closing my eyes. Continuing to look at him was too much. I feared my feelings were written all over my face and I didn't feel ready to acknowledge them, even though the strength of them was mirrored in Dean's eyes.

Dean took the sentiment of taking it slow to extremes. By the time I could comfortably take three fingers, I was aching with frustration and a puddle of precome had formed in and around my navel. I was ready to start begging when Dean slid his fingers out and reached for the condom. I watched as he rolled it onto his leaking erection and slicked himself up. My racing pulse sped up more, and I rolled over. I couldn't look at him anymore, and I knew it'd be easier from behind anyway.

The mattress moved under me as Dean shuffled into position, and his sheathed dick nudged the back of my thigh. He guided himself, rubbing the tip back and forth over my hole until the head pushed in. I tightened up and forced him out in reflex.

"Do you want to stop?" He hesitated, one hand resting on my lower back.

"No. Sorry. Try again." I lowered my head onto my folded arms, my arse in the air. Dean pressed in again and I forced myself to breathe out and bear down. He filled me slowly, not stopping, just inching in more until I felt his balls bump my arse, his thighs pressed against mine.

"You okay?" He ran his hands over my back, then slid one under me and grasped my dick. It had softened without me realising.

"Yeah."

"If it hurts, I'll stop."

"It doesn't hurt." It burned, but it wasn't exactly painful. I was full, almost uncomfortably so, and I wasn't sure yet whether I would get to like it.

Dean held still, stroking me firmly until I stiffened again in his hand. Only then did he begin to move, slowly and carefully, until his dick dragged across my prostate and sent sparks up my spine.

"Fuck!" I pushed back onto him, forcing him deeper.

"Better?"

"Yeah. Fuck me," I gasped.

He picked up the pace, but not so much that he slammed into me. He continued jerking me off to the rhythm of his thrusts into my arse, and it didn't take long before my balls tightened, and my orgasm rocked through me. I hadn't known if I could come like this, but the dual sensations of his hand on me and his dick in me were too much. I clenched tight and spurted onto the bed beneath me. Dean took his hand away and gripped my hips harder. A couple more pumps into me and I felt him twitching and pulsing, filling the condom. For a second, I wondered what it would feel like without the rubber in the way.

Carefully, Dean pulled out, and I collapsed onto the bed, grimacing as my stomach landed on the wet patch. I turned onto my side and experimentally ran my hand over my belly. I expected my insides to feel like they'd been rearranged, but all I felt was the warm flush of the aftermath of an amazing orgasm, and slight soreness in my arse.

"Are you okay?" Dean tossed the condom away somewhere and lay down facing me.

"Yeah."

"We don't have to do it again if you didn't like it."

"I did like it. I prefer fucking you, but I definitely want to do it again."

Dean pressed closer, tucking his face into my neck. I slid my arms around him and held him tight. His back was slick with sweat, hair damp as it brushed my face.

"I love you," he murmured. My breath caught in my throat. His face heated against my shoulder. "Sorry, I didn't mean to say that."

"It's okay." I wanted to say it back. I really wanted to say it back. I was sure I felt the same, but it had been such a short time. Then again, I'd cared about him for eight years. If I hadn't left Mangrove River, had seen more of him, picked things up with him when he turned eighteen, what then? Yeah, I'd have fallen for him in a heartbeat. I'd only ever told one person I loved them and that had been Bianca. This didn't feel the same. It was more intense in every respect. If I'd stayed in Mangrove River, I'd have been with him without a doubt. Would it have lasted all this time?

We lay together and cuddled for a long time. I said before I wasn't a cuddler, but with him, if we weren't fucking, I just wanted to hold him. I couldn't get enough. Feeling him against me, in my arms, made me smile. We exchanged a few lazy kisses, but mostly we just rested together, not even talking. His words echoed around my head: "I love you." I wanted to hear it again, maybe in a week or two, when I could say it back, because I knew I would. I just couldn't seem to get the words out of my mouth at that moment. Maybe because it seemed contrived. People often said the 'L' word when they were fucking. I knew Dean meant it, but I wanted him to know I meant it when I said it. I didn't want him to think I only said it because he had, or because my mind was blown from sex.

When I woke, it was dawn and I was alone. I frowned, wondering why Dean left again in the middle of the night, but then I noticed his shirt where he'd thrown it last night. A moment later, the door opened, and he came in, bare-chested and wearing only jeans and shoes. I raised an eyebrow by way of a question.

"Bathroom." He unfastened his jeans and shoved them down. "It's still early."

"Yeah." I sat up slowly. Last night's beer had begun to make itself known. "I'll be back in a minute." I pulled on shorts and flipflops, grabbed my toothbrush, and made my way to the shower block. Again, I reminded myself I needed to do something about getting a proper place to live. Already money was starting to come in from a few new gym members and I could probably sneak enough out of the business account to pay a deposit.

I took a piss, scrubbed my teeth, and went back to the van. Dean was sleeping when I crawled into bed beside him, and I wrapped myself around his warm body, my dick nestling into the crack of his arse.

I didn't sleep again. I lay still, listening to Dean's soft, steady breathing, and thinking about what came next. When I had a decent place, Darcy and Harley could come to visit and I couldn't wait to see them. What would they think of Dean? Darcy was a very good judge of character already, and I hoped she would be accepting. They were teaching all kinds of modern shit in schools now, like being accepting of gays and trans people. She was happy Bianca had someone new, but would it confuse her that I was with a man? Harley would follow whatever Darcy did, so if she approved, so would Harley.

What about Brax? My thoughts drifted to my brother, thousands of miles away in the States. He'd be coming for a visit before too much longer. I was more anxious about his reaction than anyone else's. If people in the Bay didn't like it, fuck them. If my kids didn't, well, I'd try to explain it to them, but if they simply didn't like Dean, at least they didn't have to live with me and stomach it. But if Brax hated it, I'd be gutted.

I reached for my phone and checked the time. It would be about eleven at night in LA. I slid away from Dean again, put my underwear on, and crept out of the van. I had to know what he thought, or it was just going to niggle away at me. I called before I could talk myself out of it and waited for him to answer.

"Heath. What's up?"

"Hey." I swallowed. Damn it. I wasn't a kid looking for his approval. But I didn't want him to hate my choices.

"Don't tell me. You need some money." He laughed.

"No, things are good, thanks. The gym's doing well so far."

"That's good. So, what are you calling about?"

"You think I only call you to bludge off you?"

"That's usually the reason. Come on, Heath. Something's going on."

"I met someone," I blurted.

"Oh? I'm guessing it's serious for you to be calling about it. What time is it there? Four in the morning?"

"Yeah." I took a breath. "I was thinking about what you might think of this."

"Heath, you're not a kid any more. You don't need my approval." He said exactly what I'd thought myself. "Unless it's Ricky, and I hardly think that's gonna work, since she's here, asleep."

I snorted. "It's not, um, it's…" I broke off. Shit. He would hate it. He'd hate _me._

"Is it a guy?"

"What? Why would you think…?" I gasped.

"I didn't come down in the last shower, little brother. I know you fooled around with guys sometimes when you were younger."

"Fuck," I muttered. "How did you know?"

"People talk. When you hear the same gossip from two or three different people, you tend to believe it. Besides, I had eyes in my head. So did Case. I wouldn't have been surprised to see Dean Thompson sneaking out of your room in the mornings when he was staying with us. Other than that first night, of course."

"Oh, God," I groaned. "Nothing really happened. He was too young."

"I don't care, if that's what you're worried about. I mean, I care if they're jailbait, but it's up to you who you sleep with, so long as they keep you happy. So, who is he?"

My breath rushed out in relief. He didn't care I was with a guy. "It's Dean," I admitted. "He's been living in the Bay about a year. Works in the garage."

Much to my surprise, Brax laughed. "And how is he? Manage to stay out of trouble after we left?"

"Not for long, but that's a story for another day. Maybe he'll tell you himself some time."

"Yeah, we'll be over in a month or so."

We wrapped up the conversation then. I went back into the van and slid into bed again. Dean was still asleep, although he stirred when I pressed against him. I kissed his ear and tucked my face into his neck, breathing in the warm scent of him. We had time for a couple more hours' sleep.


	10. Chapter 10

CHAPTER TEN

"I called Brax last night. Well, it was about 4 a.m.," I told Dean over breakfast in the diner.

"Couldn't you sleep?" He laughed.

"No. I was wondering what he would think. About us."

"Oh." Dean put his coffee mug down and met my gaze. "And?"

"He wasn't that surprised. He knew I'd been with guys before. Gossip, apparently. Casey knew, too."

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah." I grinned. "He's cool. He guessed there was something there on both sides when you stayed with us."

"You turned me down twice," Dean reminded me. "I thought you didn't want me. I thought that one time only happened because you were so horny, and I put your hand on my dick."

"There were plenty of times I considered it. I didn't feel right about it with us kind of being your guardians."

"You were only that for six months. What about when I went to live with my uncle?"

"I still felt guilty. You were a kid."

"Whatever. I'm not now." Dean smiled and winked.

"You know, you could have called after we moved here, but you never did."

"I almost did after I turned eighteen. I had this stupid idea about turning up at your door and you dragging me off to bed. Then I told myself not to be a dick. I'd show up and you'd be with someone. I didn't need that, so I stopped hoping and got on with stuff. Then things started going wrong and I didn't want you to see me."

"I'm sorry. I kept thinking about you, on and off. I was thinking about you my first day here on the beach. Then suddenly I looked up and there you were." I smiled at the memory.

"Best day I'd had in a while." Dean leaned across the table and planted a firm kiss on my mouth, just as Irene came over to collect our empty plates.

"Oh!" She gasped.

"I'm sorry." Dean pulled back, red-faced and anxious as if he thought I'd be mad. I reached for his hand and grasped it firmly.

"Um, Irene. Hey. Something I should have told you."

"I'll say." She gawked at me, eyes wide. "I never knew you, um, you were _like that."_

"You've only really known me with Bianca," I reminded her. "Or on my own. I didn't make it obvious before, but things have changed."

"So I see."

I sighed. "You're anti-gay?"

"Goodness, darl, of course not! I'm not anti-anything, me. I'm just surprised, at both of you." Her stunned expression slid into a smile. "So long as you're happy, that's the only thing that matters."

"I'm sure you'd rather he picked someone other than me," Dean said wryly.

"I don't know, love, you've bucked your ideas up just lately. I think the shock over going to court, and now this apprenticeship with Justin has probably been the making of you. Not to mention…" She glanced at me and smiled. "Heath'll keep you on the straight and narrow, I'm sure."

I snorted. "Maybe not that straight, Irene," I teased.

"Oh, you!" She smacked me across the back of the head. "So, does anyone else know? I don't want to be the one to gossip about –"

"Of course you don't." I chuckled. "Those that matter already know. Colby, Justin, Robbo, and Willow. And Brax. I called him."

"It must be serious. What about Bianca?"

"I've yet to have that conversation. Not much she can say. She has a boyfriend, too." I winked, and both Irene and Dean laughed. At least Irene seemed more inclined to be friendly towards Dean now.

"Sorry," Dean said again as we left the diner a few minutes later. "I shouldn't have outed you like that."

"Stop saying you're sorry." I grabbed his arm and pulled him to a halt. "It won't be long before everybody knows." After a brief pause, I cupped his face in both hands and covered his mouth with mine. The kiss was only brief, but enough to draw the attention of John Palmer and Alf who were on their way to the diner for breakfast.

"Strike me flamin' handsome!" Alf exclaimed.

"Um, sorry." I shot him a grin. "Too much PDA?"

"None of my business." Alf shook his head and his lips twitched. "At least the pair of you have a few things in common."

He headed into the diner, leaving Palmer staring at us, mouth agape. I grinned, lifted my arm, and tapped my watch. "Don't forget the time, John."

"I opened up bang on time!" Palmer said, instantly outraged. "Willow's there taking a class, and Tony's spotting the weights."

"I'm just pulling your leg. I'm heading to the gym now myself. Dean, I'll see you tonight." I set off for the gym and Dean headed in the other direction, towards the garage.

I spent a few hours at the gym, then in the afternoon left Palmer in charge while I went to check out houses for rent. As luck would have it, a bungalow close to the Morgans' place had just come up for rent, and its previous tenants had already moved out so there was no wait. The agent in Yabbie Creek offered to show it to me that evening and I went straight there after I finished my last couple of hours at the gym.

The bungalow was ideal – not too large, two bedrooms, nice open-plan lounge-diner-kitchen, and a small garden featuring nothing but grass and a patio area. Perfect, because I hated gardening. I could push a mower around the grass, but I didn't do flowers and weeding. I could afford the deposit and I signed the paperwork there and then. As soon as I paid the deposit, which I promised to do by bank transfer that evening, I could get the keys within a couple of days as soon as they'd done their customary checks.

I made my way over to Salt to get take away food, and found Dean playing pool with Ryder downstairs. Ryder was sour and sulky, making half-hearted attempts to hit the balls. Neither of them had seen me, and I grinned as I listened to what Dean was saying.

"Everyone falls out with their folks when they're your age."

"Did you?"

"I didn't have that luxury. I never knew my dad, and my mum tried to kill me, then moved out and left me when I was sixteen. Heath and his brothers looked after me for a few months until an elderly uncle showed up and took me on. You have Roo and Alf and Leah. They all care about you."

"They treat me like a kid," Ryder grouched.

"You are a kid. They just want what's best for you. You should think yourself lucky."

"I'd rather have had the Braxtons bring me up. That would've been cool," Ryder said.

I walked up behind Dean and wrapped my arms around him, resting my cheek against his. Ryder's eyes widened, and his mouth dropped open. "Dean's right," I said. "If your family loves you, you should hang onto them. Growing up with 'the Braxtons' isn't all it's cracked up to be. My little brother got shot. I was a mess, always in trouble. My elder brother ended up in jail for something he didn't do, escaped, went on the run, and nearly got killed."

"Wow! I didn't know." Ryder gaped wider. "But you seem to have done all right."

"Yeah, now I'm doing all right. Not so much when I was your age. Or even Dean's age."

"Are you two, um, you know?" Ryder flushed scarlet.

"What's it look like?" I kissed Dean's cheek.

"Well, um, that's cool. My best friend Ty was gay. He thought I'd hate him for it, but it didn't make any difference. I was just sad when he left."

"Where'd he go?" Dean asked.

"To live with his mum. John Palmer and Marilyn fostered him, but then his mum wanted him back. I miss him. Coco and Raffy are awesome, but they're girls."

"Maybe you can visit some time," Dean suggested. "Think about what I said. Your family just want to make sure you don't end up like how I was a few weeks ago."

"Okay. Yeah. I guess I'll go home and face the music." The kid put his pool cue down and set off.

"Giving good advice in your old age?" I teased Dean

"Fuck off," he muttered, grinning.

I kissed his cheek again. "I got a house."

"Oh yeah?" He turned in my arms and rested his hands on my waist. Realising we were drawing some unpleasant attention from a group of guys by the door, I stepped back and took my hands off him.

"There's a bungalow near the Morgans' place come up for rent. I went to see it earlier and signed some stuff. Just need to pay the deposit and I'll have the keys in a few days."

"That's great!" Dean beamed.

"Yeah, we won't have to keep going to the shower block to clean up," I whispered. "Let's go and get some food."

We went upstairs to Salt to get takeaway, then returned to Dean's caravan. My sheets still needed washing.

Three days later I had the keys for the bungalow and I took Dean with me to check it out. It was furnished, but the bed had no mattress, and I needed furnishings and kitchen stuff. As delighted as I was to have the place, shopping for this sort of stuff didn't thrill me. Dean came with me in my truck to Yabbie Creek to buy cutlery, crockery, bedding, food supplies, and a few other bits and pieces. I ordered a mattress to be delivered the next week, realising I'd have to continue to sleep in the van for the time being.

The next day I went to see Alf and paid him the last few days for the van rent, explaining I wouldn't need it anymore.

"Young Thompson moving with you?" he asked.

"Um, no, he still needs his van."

"Righto."

I left Alf, frowning. His words made me wonder if Dean hoped for me to ask him to move in. It had only been a few weeks and I definitely wasn't ready to live with him. As much as I felt for him, I wanted my own living space. I didn't even want a casual housemate. I decided I should probably go and talk to him about it and make sure we were on the same page.

I headed back to the caravan park to look for him, and found drama happening. A woman, clearly drunk out of her mind, danced around the firepit to music blasting from a portable stereo, while Dean struggled to grab her and calm her down. I hadn't seen her for years, but other than ageing a bit, she didn't look much different. Karen Thompson.

"Mum, stop!" Dean turned off the music. "I have to live here. Alf will throw me out of my van if people complain."

"Who cares? You never used to. I missed you, baby. I want to celebrate!" Karen shouted.

"You left me, remember? Twice."

Twice? I remembered her leaving him when he was sixteen, but apparently something else had happened since.

"I have to have my own life as well, Deano. But I'm here now. We have lots of catching up to do." She snatched up a bottle of wine from the ground and swigged some straight from the bottle.

"Mum, stop!" Dean protested and took the bottle from her. "You've had enough."

"Oh, you're such a little party-pooper. What happened to you?"

"I grew up!"

"You okay?" I asked as I approached slowly. I didn't want to make things worse for him, but it looked like he could use some help. Karen Thompson was crazy, and it wouldn't surprise me if she tried to hurt him again. She turned towards me, planted her hands on her hips, and scowled.

"Well, if it isn't Heath Braxton. What are you doing here?"

"I live here," I said calmly.

"You live here. Following my Dean around, are you?"

I glanced at him, not sure what to say for once. He opened his mouth to answer, but Karen carried on.

"You weren't there when he needed you, were you? Broke his heart, you did. Clearing off and leaving him all alone."

"Mum, stop." Dean reddened and grabbed her arm. "He didn't leave me. He had a life. You left."

"I needed to find myself!" Karen screeched. "You were a horrible brat, cramping my style! Useless, you were. Breaking things, making a mess of everything you touched, getting in my way. I hated you! Giving birth to you was the worst day of my life!"

Dean flinched as if she'd struck him and moved closer to my side. I put my hand on his shoulder, not sure if I should do anything more obvious.

"That's right, go running to big tough Heath Braxton, just like you always did. What's he gonna do, huh? Screw your little queer arse the way you always wanted?"

"Oh my God," Dean groaned, trembling.

"Hey, it's okay." The hell with Karen. I slid my arm around him.

"Oh, so he is?" she sneered. "What do the fine folks of Summer Bay think of you, pair of queer boys flaunting yourselves all over town?!"

Dean shuddered, his face bright red. "I'm so sorry," he muttered.

"Don't. It's not your fault."

A car pulled up behind me and two doors slammed. Much to my relief, Colby and a colleague came to our rescue. Colby glanced at Dean. "Are you okay?"

Dean nodded. "She's drunk."

"I think we need to go and cool down and sober up," Colby said to Karen. "Come on, Karen. Let us help you."

"I don't need your help! Dirty cop! You used to be a River Boy! What happened? Another one deserting my Dean!"

Colby's colleague looked at him with raised eyebrows. "Let's take her to the hospital," Colby said. "Come on, Karen. We need to get you checked out."

"I don't need checking out. What do you think, I'm crazy or something? I just had a couple of drinks to celebrate, now I'm back with my little boy." Suddenly Karen threw herself at Dean and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Don't let them take me, baby. I don't want to be locked up."

"They're just taking you to the hospital, Mum." Dean looked helplessly at Colby, and he and his colleague grasped Karen's arms to pull her away from Dean. Suddenly she sagged and let them lead her away to the car.

"I'd better go with them." Dean turned away from me and headed for his car where he'd left it beside his van.

I jogged after him. "I'll go with you."

"You don't have to deal with this shit."

"I'm going."

"Okay. Thanks." He unlocked the car and I got in the passenger side. When Colby's car pulled away, we followed.

"Did she come back after I left Mangrove River?" I asked.

"Yeah. It was before I, um, before I went to jail. She seemed okay for a while. She moved back into the old house and I saw quite a bit of her. It didn't last long. After I had the accident, she didn't want anything to do with me."

"Your own mother turned her back on you when you were in a wheelchair?" It took a lot to shock me, but even knowing how Karen was, I couldn't believe she could have been so heartless.

"She thought I was too much trouble, like I'd done it on purpose. And she knew there was a good chance I'd end up inside. Willow and a couple of my other mates helped me until I was back on my feet. Mum didn't come to see me once when I was in jail."

"I'm sorry." The words 'what a bitch' were on the tip of my tongue, but I didn't voice them. Despite everything she'd done, she was still Dean's mum and I doubted he would thank me for bad-mouthing her. How I wished he'd called me. It wouldn't have mattered where I was, who I was with, or what I was doing. I'd have dropped everything.


	11. Chapter 11

CHAPTER ELEVEN

We waited at the hospital while Karen was assessed. Then her doctor came to speak to Dean and suggested his mother would be best going into a special hospital. He knew it and I knew it, but when he went to talk to her about it, she cried, begged, and pleaded, assuring Dean she'd be better, and he was all she needed.

I almost bit my tongue out in my efforts not to say anything as we travelled back to the caravan park. Karen had plenty to say, about how I was bad for Dean and he'd be better off trying to be normal and finding a nice girl instead, like Willow.

"Mum, I've always been gay, you know that," Dean said with a sigh.

"You just haven't met the right girl. I always thought Willow would be a nice girlfriend for you. You always spent so much time together."

"She's got a boyfriend."

"I'm sure that wouldn't last if you showed her you were interested."

"I'm not interested, and she's dating my boss."

The conversation went on like that until we parked by Dean's van. I didn't want to leave him alone with her, but he insisted he'd be fine. He was going to call Salt and order pizza, then let Karen sleep for a while. He'd text me, but he wanted to be there to keep an eye on her.

I just knew things would go wrong – they always did where Karen was concerned. I went to the diner, then Salt, looking for Willow, but I didn't find her. I thought Dean could do with his friends around in case things blew up again. I was just leaving Salt when I ran into Colby.

"Hey," he greeted. "How did things go at the hospital."

"Dean brought her back to the caravan." I rolled my eyes.

"Damn it. He should have signed her into the facility they offered. This has been going on for years. We never saw that much of it back in Mangrove River, because she was always messing around with some man or other, drinking, and abandoning Dean. But when she's around, she's dangerous."

"I know."

"She tried to kill him."

"I know!" I scowled. "I found him in our shed when he was sixteen. She'd gone for him with a knife. That's why we took him in."

"Sorry, I know." Colby huffed his breath out. "There's not a lot we can do except make sure we're on hand if it goes pear-shaped. At least you live right near him. Call me if anything happens, will you? Doesn't matter what time it is. Do you have my number?"

"No."

We swapped numbers and went our separate ways, both anxious. I returned to the caravan park and found everything quiet. A light was on in Dean's van, but there was no music or shouting. I opened my windows and stayed alert, waiting for something to happen, but nothing did. Eventually, I must have fallen asleep and when I woke the next morning, all was quiet. I hadn't even received a text from Dean, but moments later my phone beeped.

 _Sorry I didn't get in touch last night. Things ok for now. Mum is calm and sober. Catch you later._

 _Call me if you need me,_ I replied. Reluctantly, I went to the gym, hating to be away from the caravan park in case Karen decided to try to hurt Dean again. I couldn't get the niggling feeling out of my head that her current calm state wouldn't last long.

At lunch time, I left Palmer in charge, grabbed some food from the diner, and took it back to the caravan park. As I approached, I found drama in progress, and ran the last few meters in growing horror. The door to Dean's van was open, Willow and a female cop were trying to drag two bodies outside, and sirens screamed in the distance.

"What happened?" I tossed the bag of food on the ground and steered Willow out of the way, so I could get to Dean. A cut on his head had bled all over his forehead and I couldn't tell if he was breathing. The strong smell of gas drifted out of the van. I carefully gathered him up and carried him down the steps, then laid him on the grass. The cop emerged moments later, struggling with the weight of Karen's body over her shoulder.

"Dean. Christ," I muttered, bending over him to check if he was breathing. A faint, barely-there puff of air touched my ear. "What happened?" I asked Willow.

"I don't know." She dropped to her knees the other side of Dean. "I went to check on them. I opened the door and saw him lying there. Then I smelled the gas. The stove was on, but not lit. I don't know what happened to his head, whether he hit it as he passed out, or if…" She glanced up at me. "I think Karen might have hit him."

Dean groaned, and I turned my attention back to him, just as Colby arrived at a run, and an ambulance pulled into the park. "I called the ambos," Willow said. "Chelsea called Colby."

I looked up at the blonde female cop and guessed she must be Chelsea. Thank God she and Willow had been on hand. I slid my arm under Dean's shoulders and propped him up, turning him sideways as he coughed and began to vomit. Willow got out of the way just in time before he threw up on her legs. A paramedic came to us, another attending to Karen.

Dean's paramedic wiped his face and put an oxygen mask on him as Willow explained what she'd found. Dean struggled and moaned, trying to pull the mask off his face. I held his hands, then helped the paramedic get him up and lay him on a wheeled stretcher. He pulled the mask off and turned frightened eyes on me. "Where's Mum? What happened? Is she okay?"

I looked around and discovered Karen was being loaded into the ambulance. She was moving around on the stretcher, clearly alive.

"She's all right," I said. "Dean, settle down. You've hit your head." I grasped his hand again and held it tight. "Can you remember what happened?"

"No. I fell. Hit my head. I feel sick." He turned his head away and threw up violently, heaving and trembling. The paramedic set up a drip and inserted a cannula into his arm.

"The gas was on," I told him. "On the stove."

"Were you cooking something?"

"No. Mum said she was gonna make us some food. She had the frying pan in her hand."

Willow leapt up and rushed into the van, despite the lingering gas. A moment later she emerged with a frying pan in her hand. "There's blood on it! She hit him in the head with it!" she cried. "She could have killed him."

Dean's green eyes filled, and his mouth trembled. The paramedic put the oxygen mask back over his face and began strapping him to the stretcher. "We need to take him in for a proper assessment."

"No. I'm okay."

"You're not okay." I squeezed his hand in mine. "You need to get this head wound checked out. I'll come with you."

"Me too," Willow said at once.

"I'll follow," Colby added. "Any of you want to ride with me?"

"I'll bring my truck in case I need to stay." I pulled the keys out of my pocket. "Come with me if you want, Willow."

"Okay, I will. I'll just text Justin and tell him what's going on. He's going to wonder why Dean's not at work, and we have community service later. I'll tell John as well."

"I'll call John." I pulled out my phone.

"He's probably more likely to believe you." Willow gave me a brief smile.

I called Palmer and asked him to hold the fort for the afternoon, adding that Dean's mother had attacked him and he was being taken to hospital. "Willow's with us." I added. "I'll make sure she's back in time for her service, but Dean's not going to be up to it today."

"I'll have to write a report," Palmer said stuffily.

"Write one. Dean's been hit in the head and knocked unconscious, and almost gassed to death. You can get the details from the hospital later if you need them. Or speak to Colby. He's with us."

"Oh. Right. Well, I hope he's all right."

"He will be. I'll catch up with you later."

The paramedics loaded Dean's stretcher into the ambulance, and Willow and I went to my truck. Colby went for his car with Chelsea, and we all set off in convoy to the hospital.

"That woman needs locking up, she's crazy," Willow said.

"I know that. But it's Dean who has to sign the papers."

"He will after this. He has to."

"We'll have to convince him. I don't think it'll be too difficult. You might remember when he was sixteen – "

"She tried to stab him. That's when he went to you."

"Yeah. I remember." My lips twitched as I remembered, not the part where I found Dean hiding in the shed, terrified, but the part where he slept in my arms.

"That's funny?" Willow snapped.

"No. I was thinking about the rest of it. Him staying with us."

"Oh. He worshipped the ground you walked on."

"I know."

Willow smiled. "Who'd have thought you'd end up together? You are together, aren't you? I mean, it's not just a fling for you? He's been hurt so much already."

"It's not a fling." I glanced at her. "I love him, all right? But I haven't said so, so don't go blabbing."

Willow beamed. "I won't."

When we arrived at the hospital, we were directed to the waiting room where we sat with Colby and Chelsea. It turned out the pair of them had been in a relationship before Colby moved to the Bay, and from the way they looked at each other, they were intending to pick up where they left off. She seemed a nice enough woman and Colby looked at her the way I'd caught Dean looking at me.

I was desperate to see him, but they wouldn't let us in while they were treating him. I glanced at my watch a hundred times, and eventually, Dean came to us on foot. He had an adhesive dressing on his temple and seemed a little unsteady on his feet, but he was okay. I leapt up from my chair and pulled him into my arms, not caring what the others thought.

"I'm okay." He hugged me tight. "No concussion and the gas hasn't done any damage."

"How's Karen?" Colby asked.

I released Dean and he faced the others. "She's okay too. They're doing a psyche assessment."

"You have to let them take her to that facility this time," Willow told him. "For her own good. And yours. She could have killed you."

"She left the gas on by mistake." Dean frowned.

"She knocked you out first. Hit you with a pan," I reminded him.

He shook his head. "I was trying not to think about that."

"She'll be in safe hands, but it'll be best for everyone. You can't live like this. What if she kills you next time?" Willow said.

Dean blanched, then nodded. "I know you're right. It's just hard. I'll be right back." He opened the door and left us.

"I'll go with him when he tells her." Colby followed Dean and the rest of us sat down again. I checked my phone and discovered a text from Palmer, asking if Willow would be back for her aerobics class in an hour and then her service.

"Willow, are you up to taking your class in an hour?" I asked.

"Yes, of course. Is that Palmer?"

I nodded and tapped out a reply telling him Willow would be back, but that Dean wouldn't be up to doing his service that day. When Dean and Colby returned to us a few minutes later, I took Dean home, to my own van, and Colby and Chelsea drove Willow back to the gym.

"How are you feeling?" I asked as Dean kicked off his shoes and lay down on my bed.

"I still feel sick. They said I would for a while."

I found a bucket under the small sink in the van and put it near the bed. "Just in case."

"Thanks. I think I'll be okay."

"You scared the hell out of me today," I confessed as I sat down beside him. "When I saw Willow trying to drag your body out of the van, I thought… I don't know what I thought."

"I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault. But you know you're doing the right thing, right? With your mum?"

"Yeah, I know. She's a danger to herself as well as me. You know what the last thing she said to me was, when I told her she was going into that hospital? She said she was glad, because she wouldn't have to see me. Sometimes she's okay, but mostly, she just hates me. That night when I was sixteen, wasn't the first time. She'd lock me in my room, leave me without food and water for a whole day and night sometimes. She hit me with whatever was nearest. A bottle once. A vase. I was just a kid. I kept telling myself it was my fault, that I must have done something wrong, but I never knew what it was." He rolled away from me, tears spilling over. "She hates me. My own mother wishes I was dead."

"Hey, come on." I reached for him and pulled him up into my arms, holding him tight as he wept. His whole body shook as the pain poured out of him. I stroked my hands up and down his back, doing my best to soothe him and not really knowing how to. Eventually, he went limp in my arms and just rested there, breathing hard but no longer crying.

"Sorry about that," he croaked.

"It's okay. You needed to let it out." I grabbed a discarded shirt from beside the bed and wiped his face like he was a little kid, the same way I would have with Harley after he had a crying fit and his face was covered in tears and snot.

Dean shuddered and took the shirt from me to finish the job himself. "Sorry. I'm a mess. You shouldn't be doing this."

"Of course I should." I took the shirt back and tossed it aside, then grasped his hands in mine. "I'm here, always. I love you," I said firmly. I didn't even think about it. It was right there, in my heart, waiting to be spilled out.

"You do?" His pain-filled eyes softened.

"Yeah. I love you, Dean. You're not on your own with this. Or with anything. I'm not going anywhere."

"I love you, too. And thanks. For taking care of me when I'm such a fuck up." He leaned closer again and slid his arms around my neck. I brushed my lips across his, then just held him. We sat that way for a long time.


End file.
